Anxiety and Stress: Dealing with The Problem When Having Sex with Someone New!
by For somebody who’s been suffering from anxiety since a young age, performance anxiety is a major hurdle I’ve had to learn to overcome when bedding new girls. Having sex with someone new is probably the most exciting thing two people could do, so don’t let anxiety ruin it for you. So how do you control the situation and keep that performance anxiety at bay? Read on…
Elevate self image through personal grooming and hygiene!
Confidence is paramount in controlling anxiety and elevating self image. How do you do that? By grooming yourself properly prior to the special night, day, whatever it may be. This is what I usually do!
1. Have a thorough shower especially paying attention to pubic area.
2. Shave face. Not a day goes by that I don’t shave, and it’s a major contributing factor that I look at least 5 years younger than what I am!
3. Brush teeth as yellow teeth are very unattractive.
4. Apply men’s perfume, some may use deodorant, I only use expensive cologne.
5. Dress presentably. This means comfortably in clean, descent attire.
6. Pay attention to hair. In my case I tend to slick my hair back, its how I roll!
7. Ensure breath smells desirably. I chew one or two chewy gums.
8. Trim pubes (I do this occasionally) as it feels good and looks more presentable!
9. Moisturise facial and hand skin. It helps retain skin moisture and makes your skin feel smooth!
After I spend a good 1-2 hours grooming myself to my desired extent, I generally feel on top of the world! My self confidence is quite high as I plan the night ahead. I don’t have to worry about looking and smelling like shit!
Throw away the cigarettes, drugs, and alcohol!
I hate cigarette smoke, it’s foul and putrid. So refrain from smoking like a chimney on the night you have sex with someone new for the first time. This is a time you have to stay sober and have full control of your body and mind. Drinking alcohol can be a sure way to ruining any chance you have of getting it up! So if you plan on having some sex, then drink everything but booze! Leave the booze to the ones who relegate themselves to jerking off! You need to be at your mental and physical peak to get it right and actually enjoy the experience together! Alcohol and drugs can make you go paranoid, and thus elevate stress, not decrease it! Instead stock up with non alcoholic drinks, preferably the type your partner likes!
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Post CommentBruce Officer
On August 24, 2010 at 5:09 pm
Unfortunately none of that addresses the fear that maybe you won’t be as good in bed as her previous fella. Helps get you to the bed, true, but doesn’t help much when you’re in it.
helmkhat
On August 24, 2010 at 5:11 pm
ok..
Bruce Officer
On August 24, 2010 at 5:17 pm
Sorry, I didn’t spot page two. Please delete my previous comment.
ceegirl
On August 24, 2010 at 5:24 pm
wow, what can i say
Ruby Hawk
On August 24, 2010 at 5:43 pm
I hadn’t thought about anyone being anxious about having sex with a new partner. It should be a fun experience.
Emmie
On August 24, 2010 at 9:32 pm
I can totally understand why someone would feel that way. Some people that suffer with anxiety doubt themselves all the time, and so being with someone that close would worry the hell out of the person.
Nice article Dejan
Emmie
PSingh1990
On August 24, 2010 at 10:54 pm
Nice Share.
Ethics0006
On August 24, 2010 at 11:10 pm
Amazing
Jimmy Shilaho
On August 25, 2010 at 12:52 am
And why should you be anxious at all?
Raj the Tora
On August 25, 2010 at 12:53 am
Very important tips indeed
Silent Wasp
On August 25, 2010 at 3:16 am
re SHILAHO
It’s not a question of whether someone should feel anxiety or not, as it’s something most people feel although through varying degree. It’s a matter of controlling the anxiety and planning better, maintaining self esteem and making the most out of the situation. Anxiety is natural, but allowing it to deter our progress in life is something we need to control ourselves, and it’s this need, especially in the dating, and the first time you sleep with a new partner experience, that needs the most attention. This is what the article addresses. It’s to help the ones who deal with an above average anxiety level, like myself. I’ve learnt to control and stem anxiety, but if you don’t suffer from it to the degree that I do, you’ll never understand where I’m coming from!
Thanks for reading and commenting otherwise SHILAHO, you’re a valued reader!
Also thanks for reading and commenting Bruce, Neppeen, Ceegirl, Psingh, Ethics, and Raj. It’s much appreciated!
A special thanks to my favourite reader Emmie. You never fail to leave a constructive article comment! You’re a valued reader of mine!
Dejan
Alaina Ellington
On August 26, 2010 at 11:24 am
Dejan,
I think this article will be helpful to many guys out there who do suffer from anxiety, and could potentially make some women pretty happy too. Not all women understand that men feel anxious about sex because the overall thought is that men are dogs and do it to do it, they can’t live without it…so why would they be anxious about something that comes so naturally to them.
Thanks for bringing this to attention! And giving some very helpful tips for controlling the anxiety I’m sure many men face.
Great article once again!
~Alaina ♥
Silent Wasp
On August 26, 2010 at 11:35 am
RE Alaina
Well you got to understand that men can put on a great facade and appear that they are calm and cool, and that the whole sexual experience is just fine and nothing to worry about! The thing is this is the real world here! I’m confident in my sexual ability; actually I’m a lot more experienced than most men my age (23)! But anxiety is a part of my daily life; it’s a hurdle that makes socially awkward situations be a little torturous. I have learnt to stem that anxiety by lifting my confidence level, and pushing the envelope!
I love sex, and having sex with someone new is very exciting! But anxiety can bring many issues to rise including erection problems, inability to develop a bond naturally and a myriad of other issues!
I may seem cool and collected, super confident, and very much in control but I could be screaming inside about to have a heart attack and die! lol well my above article can help people deal with that sensation! Thanks for reading and commenting beautiful
Dejan