Are You Constantly Late?
by We all know these people who are constantly late. We hold up dinner for them time and again. They rush in with a dozen excuses and apologies. What does this constant rude behavior say about them? Are they avoiding something, are they apprehensive, do they have unresolved emotions that make them hesitate and drag their feet. Or do they feel they are so special they should have the privilege of keeping everyone else waiting?
If you find yourself late for dinner three times in a row with several friends, then it’s time to figure out why you want to avoid them. Does someone in the group constantly pressure you or bring up a subject you’re not comfortable talking about? Once you see the problem, it’s time to address it. If it’s the friend bringing up an uncomfortable subject, find the time and place to talk to him or her about it. Say something like, I look forward to spending time with you but discussing this subject makes me very uncomfortable. Could we please talk about something else?
If the shoe is on the other foot, and it’s the other person who is constantly late, and you think this person feels he or she’s so special that it’s okay to keep everyone waiting, say something like, I want to tell you that I enjoy your company and when you are always late it really upsets me. It makes me feel like you didn’t want to be here and had rather be somewhere else.
About yourself; Do you keep your husband or wife waiting often? If so, ask yourself why you do. Do you feel he should be more involved in cleaning, taking care of the kids or making plans for the family? If that’s the case make a confession, “I think I’ve figured out why I have kept you waiting. You used to help out more with the kids and planning outings for the family but now, I find myself shouldering most of the responsibility. I know you didn’t plan it to be like that, but it makes me sad that you are not more involved. How about we make it a team effort?
Being constantly late can be a sign of depression or a more serous psychological problem. It is worth thinking about if you, a friend, or family member are habitually more than a few minutes late. Depression causes sadness, loss of sleep and appetite and it also causes loss of focus and energy. Depressed people are apt to be late to a lot of different things.
Attention Deficit Disorder can make people consistently late because they are constantly searching for misplaced keys and so on. They might make a wrong turn or lose their way. So don’t be harsh with someone who has ADD or depression. Others are fair game.
Anyone who is constantly late should start their day with a time buffer. Start getting ready to go at least 15 minutes before you think you need to, and plan to leave at least 15 minutes before you normally do. Don’t give yourself any lee way at the expense of others. Remind yourself that you are not the best judge of time. Put yourself in the place of the person waiting for you. Think about his or her anxiety over the fact that time means nothing to you. Do you really want to put your friends through the stress of constantly waiting for you? You are not any more special than anyone else. You have 24 hours in the day and your friends and associates time is just as valuable as yours.
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Liked it
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I set my bedroom clock five minutes fast – even though I know that, I believe the time it tells me and so that enables me to get to where I’m going on time!I also read an article today somewhere about how people shouldn’t turn up too early, thus making the host or whoever feeling guilty because they’re not ready.
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Post Commentsara20
On May 20, 2010 at 2:46 am
Nice Writing and sharing Good & informative Piece. Thanks and Cheers.
alfabeta
On May 20, 2010 at 4:53 am
Families with small childern are exused for being late in my opinon! Especially lone-parents with more than one child… Sometimes it doesn’t matter how early you start in the morning. A little one needs to use the potty, another one does not want to take the pyjama off, and everyones stuck at at home until that special teddy is found… And when you are finally ready to go it is potty-time again…
Val Mills
On May 20, 2010 at 5:04 am
Kehinde Adeniyi
On May 20, 2010 at 5:22 am
A really good point and tactful approach as well.
maeraquel
On May 20, 2010 at 6:18 am
I feel disrespected every time my partner shows up late for our agreed meeting time. I can forgive acquaintances but if it comes to special people in my life, I cannot tolerate tardiness.
Pete Marshall
On May 20, 2010 at 6:40 am
my wife sets the clock 15 minutes fast, its the only way she can get the kids to school on time, where as i, knowing its 15 minutes fact, take 20 minutes off & am always late… another good write
papaleng
On May 20, 2010 at 7:25 am
Tell it to the Pilipinos, we have what we call “Pilipino Time” meaning …in most cases we came late for appointments..
Starpisces
On May 20, 2010 at 8:41 am
We call that “rubber time” (can stretch)…heehee, luckily I am always being praised for being punctual, unless with very good reason and the person will be informed. It is a kind of respect.
However, when we attend those Chinese wedding dinner, we cannot be punctual as the time indicated on the card is not accurate, so most people don’t come punctually otherwise will be very bored there unless we have interesting people there to chit chat.
Christine Ramsay
On May 20, 2010 at 8:54 am
My hubby could never be late for anything. He always likes to be really early which can be very annoying. I prefer to be punctual. An interesting piece.
Christine
bestone
On May 20, 2010 at 10:58 am
Thank you and hope for the best information that you will get to read articles and by similar embroidery please keep writing.
Atanacio
On May 20, 2010 at 11:53 am
yeah thats me another very good entry
Jamie Myles
On May 20, 2010 at 11:57 am
My Mother was a chronically late person. Of course she had 5 kids to deal with so if we made it anywhere on time it was a miracle. I on the other hand am a chronically early arriver. which is just as bad. I am working on the problem.
Judy Kaelin
On May 20, 2010 at 12:10 pm
Very good information – Never late – I plan ahead and prepare things ahead of time.
Snooky
On May 20, 2010 at 1:08 pm
Oh no, I’d rather not show up than to show up late.
Vikram Chhabra
On May 20, 2010 at 3:55 pm
I hate getting late for commitments. But sometimes it turns against me. Indian weddings never start on time and many times I have found myself reaching before the actual marriage parties…:)
Mary Patricia Bird
On May 20, 2010 at 5:28 pm
I wish my husband would consider the anxiety he is causing the person who is waiting on him (me). Great article!
Tulan
On May 20, 2010 at 10:14 pm
I pride myself on never being late, In fact I usually have to wait in the car just so I won’t be too early.
njokim
On May 21, 2010 at 8:15 am
great tips!
LoveDoctor
On May 21, 2010 at 8:30 am
This is an excellent article Ruby. It should be on Hot content. I have NO tolerance for people who arrive late. This is very disrespectful and it lets the other person know that their time is not important. Of course, sometimes there are unexpected events that show up such as the train or an accident on the highway causing people to drive bumper to bumper and not make it on time to their destination. If this happens, a simple phone call. Yes, I used to go out with someone who was constantly late. This was all the time. It was very annoying. One time he made me wait for an hour at a bookstore. These types of people do suffer from depression or some type of psychological disorder I do have to agree with you or plain and simple they think they are God’s gift to the world and we owe them something.
Paul Roberts
On May 21, 2010 at 1:18 pm
When I retired out of the service, I removed my watch. It seemed that I had ran on a time hack for twenty years, always building in buffers and hit times. I found in the civilian sector that we don’t always run on a time line. It unbalanced me at first but now, give or take a few minutes doesnt have me blowing a fuse anymore with people. Good article. Friend, fan, smile
PR Mace
On May 21, 2010 at 2:01 pm
Yes, this is a problem which I have to work very hard on. Thanks for the good information. Got to go, I am late!
Shirley Shuler
On May 22, 2010 at 3:11 pm
Great tips, Ruby. I pride myself on never being late, I get things ready ahead of time.
CA Johnson
On May 23, 2010 at 4:20 pm
These are wonderful tips to avoid being late. I am never late. I set my watch to about 10 minutes faster so I know that I will be on time.