Emanate Confidence and Enthrall Your Audience

What’s your communication style? Asking for feedback

How can we tell if an audience is really listening to us and likewise how can we consistently keep their attention?

Good communication skills require a high level of self-awareness. By understanding your personal style of communicating, you will go a long way towards creating good and lasting impressions with others and keeping them with you till the end of your presentation.

It takes a lot of concentration and determination to honestly assess your own communication style and to really listen to what others tell you about the way you come across. Old habits are hard to break, and if your listening habits are as bad as many people’s are, then there’s a lot of habit-breaking to do!

Ask for and really listen to your feedback – what are they really saying – and show you are listening: let the speaker finish before you begin to talk. Speakers appreciate having the chance to say everything they would like to say without being interrupted. When you interrupt, it looks like you aren’t listening, even if you really are.

Let yourself finish listening before you begin to speak! You can’t really listen if you are busy thinking about what you want say next. Ask questions. If you are not sure you understand what the speaker has said, just ask. It is a good idea to repeat in your own words what the speaker said so that you can be sure your understanding is correct.

Learn to be bi-lingual

Men and women do communicate in very different ways and feeling at crossed purposes with an audience is usually the result of the methods different genders try to make themselves understood.

By recognizing the differences and using them to your advantage you will find it so much easier to get on your audience’s wavelength, hold their attention and ultimately feel less stressed by apparent communication problems.

Men tend to communicate by accomplishing practical things, solving problems, making physical gestures and want a tangible outcome or conclusion from a conversation. They give advice and share opinions that often women don’t want.

Women prefer to discuss and debate in elaborate and often long winded ways, with many more anecdotes, that can drive men nuts when all they want is a direct answer.

Women tend to share thoughts and feelings, focusing in emotional or social implications, whereas men tend to be more direct and practical in conversations.

Men respond better to direct requests and the practical needs of a situation, whereas women will analyse more before moving on.

Women use three times as many words and gestures in a typical day as men – it’s normal!

Women don’t want their problems fixed when they talk about them, they quite often just need to do psychological filing and relieve stress through talking.

Understanding these gender differences will help you appeal to the audience you are speaking to and hold their attention.

Use non verbal communication to your advantage

Less than 10% of what we say is verbal and your audience will judge you very quickly on your body language before you’ve uttered a word.

There are some specific techniques you can use to emanate confidence and hold your audience’s attention.

Communicate openness and confidence with open hand gestures, palms up and unbuttoning or removing your jacket. Remember the power of eye contact and a smile, leaning slightly forward to your audience, and a relaxed posture. Keep your hands away from the face and stand straight; no stooping. Demonstrate your confidence further with your head tilting occasionally rather than a stiff neck, and moving from one point on the stage to another.

At all costs avoid a rigid, unmoving posture with fixed stare, keeping your head lowered, yawning, fidgeting or rocking, scratching, pinching the bridge of your nose or other gestures of either intolerance or insecurity.

Other gestures that will undoubtedly turn off your audience will include folded arms, lack of real eye contact, sideways positioning or your back to your group, a sullen or blank expression, throat clearing, heavy breathing or frequent coughing. Be sure to avoid clenching fingers, hands in pockets or hiding the hands.

To conclude, emanate confidence with smooth and unobtrusive gestures, well paced and neither too quiet nor too loud speaking voice, and a relaxed, friendly and attentive attitude to your audience. Watching the experts at work and noting their own techniques will also help you improve your skills.