Fear of Failure and Fear of Success, Two Sides of The Same Coin: Use Your Common Sense to Conquer Them

In other words, it would mean starting to think of ourselves in terms of a whole and to the ripple effects our decisions, our choices, our actions or inactions have on others. It means thinking not so much about ‘what to get’ out of something but rather focusing on ‘what to give’ to a particular situation. It means, understanding, as the ‘Mysterious Entities’ of the story above suggested, that all are going to benefit from our “Excellence”. Being at our best, shining when we are given the chance, can make us beams of light that would enlighten our world but also that of others around us.

At the root of both Fears, ‘Fear of Failure and Fear of Success’, there’s mostly a sense of inadequacy. We might feel to be not adequate enough, in case of failure, or similarly not ‘up to the task’ in case of success. It can be paralyzing, if we allow this ‘dual-face’ fear to dominate us. A secret may lay in accepting, recognizing this ‘Fear’, not fighting or resisting it, since it would use the best of our energy in doing it. Let’s these ‘Fears’ be, but at the same time we must be totally aware of the fact that what we have to do is more important than any fear. We should never be absorbed too much in the problems at the base of these fears, but in the liberating feelings our courageous act will give us. Embracing the Fear with the Awareness that what we must do is MORE IMPORTANT will deliver us from every Ego-derived judgement. ‘Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway’ must become our new faithful belief. I happened to find out a while ago, that it is also the title of a book written by Susan Jeffers, PhD. It would be likely an helpful reading for all of us when confronted with such fears.

I, myself, have found proof of the benefits in removing the Ego out of the way in whatever task I’m tackling. For example, it gives me a shift in attitude when preparing for a speech. I wasn’t used to take it easy. I have to say though that thinking to my speech as an occasion to serve, to give, to simply share my efforts and understandings with others, released lots of the tension and performance anxiety I felt before. After all, a speech, it is not ‘for me’ or ‘about me’ but others, the ‘audience’. For them I must try my best to convey the “take-home” message. This becomes my Focus and not a flawless speech.

It might not be easy if we are used to act, think in an Ego-oriented manner, following the ‘road most travelled’ of this world. But sure the freedom from our fears, limitations, conditioning that we could experience, would be worthy the try.

May be, in this way, we could also get a better glimpse of the pearl of wisdom behind the famous quote: “Work as if you don’t need the money. Love as if you’ve never been hurt. Dance as if no one is watching. Sing as if nobody’s listening. Live as if it’s heaven on earth”.

Image via Wikipedia

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