Feel Good About Yourself – Understanding the Self Concept

The Self Concept – a term described and explained in many ways by as many scholars and laymen.  How does this seemingly abstract model relate to us on a day to day basis and how we see and feel about ourselves?

To truly feel good about ones self, the majority of ideas and beliefs regarding our own abilities and limitations have to be well balanced.  Because, as we will see, how we allow ourselves to think in relation to what we can and cannot achieve, can directly affect how we feel, emotionally and mentally, about our selves in general.

What is the Self Concept?  The Self-Concept can be described as the interplay between all the ideas and beliefs that you have about yourself and all the ideas and beliefs that you believe others have about you.  The Self Concept, broadly speaking can be said to consist of three main parts: the Self Image, Ideal Self (or Ego Ideal) and Self Esteem.  The Self Imageis how you see yourself.  You are a man or woman, a child or adult and you are twenty something or thirty something, a bricklayer or a lawyer and so on.  There also value judgements in that you are a professional footballer, a good cook and ugly or attractive.  Of course, these values are as you look in the mirror but suggests that this is how you believe others see you.  The Ideal Self or Ego Ideal are as they may sound: how you aspire to be or how you want to be in each aspect of your personality, performance and physical appearance.  The Self Image and Ideal Self are in direct contradiction of each other, or not.  The extent to which they are in contradiction or to which they differ (the gap) is demonstrated in the third component: the Self Esteem.  Self Esteem otherwise known as Self Worth and is how you value yourself or score yourself on each aspect of your being.

Practical example 1:

You see yourself as a young, fairly inexperienced woman with little formal qualifications and not very attractive.  You work in a Bakery part-time and intend to keep the job as long as possible because it is the only way that you can earn any money.  In contrast, you’ve always admired powerful, attractive, independent women with high flying jobs and dream of being like them in the same way you dream of winning the lottery.  Look at this for a moment.  Your self image is of an ugly, inexperienced woman with hardly any opportunities.  However, your ideal self is far away from ever being achievable in your own mind.  The gap, therefore, between your self image (who you see yourself to be) and your ideal self (who or what you want to be) is so big that your self esteem in these areas is bound to be negatively affected.  Typically, the bigger the gap between your self image and your ideal self, the lower your self esteem will be.