How to Let Go When You Want to Hold on

    It was Monday.  The clock was ticking away.  Helene looked up at the clock knowing that it indicated her marriage was about to dissolve in just a few hours.  It wasn’t something she wanted to do.  It wasn’t something she had ever planned for.  It just happened one day when Marvin came home one day and informed her that he wanted a divorce because he had found a younger woman.  Helene had never refused Marvin his heart’s wishes, but on that day, she was reluctant to grant him this request.  Her heart, ripped apart by sadness, conceded.  It was one of the saddest days of her life, yet, she could not hold on to a person who did not want to hold on to her. 

    Helene’s story is repeated over and over across the nation.  It, along with death and dissolved relationships, remind us that there are times in our lives when we just must “let go– like it or not”.  Letting go is never easy.   Whether it be a dissolution of a relationship, death, or even letting go of a dream, it leaves an emptiness that can only be filled in time, and sometimes is never really filled. 

Here are some things you must ask yourself if you are trying to let go of anything:

1. Why am I unwilling to truly let go?
2. Am I bitter or set on revenge as I let go?  
3. If I don’t let go, how will this influence my future growth?
4. Do I want to grow and move on with my life in a positive way?
5. Can one person or one circumstance cause me to act irrationally and not let go?
6. Are there more things out there in life that need my “touch” and help? 
7. Have I been too narrow in my thinking and allowed myself to be centered around one person? 
8. What are my chances out there to be renewed and refreshed to go on in a stronger way? 
9.  Have I prayed and asked God for guidance and help to go on? 
10. Where would I like to go from here? 
11.  How long might it take me to be able to move on and feel better?
12. Do I have friends or loved ones who have successfully experienced the same situation as I am faced with? 
13. If I don’t let go, how might I prevent myself from making new buds and blossoming? 
14. Am I free now to explore new things that will enhance my life and the lives of those I love? 
15. What are some of the “new directions” I would like to take as I let go? 
16. Am I living in the past or planning for the future? 
17. Do I really have time to hate?  Can I spend my time loving instead? 
18. What is God’s will for me now that I am letting go? 
19.  Have I taken the time to explore all the good things out there for me? 
20. Will I ever  again allow one person or one thing to grab me and hold me in its grips? 
21. Have I faced the truth and allowed the truth and its reality to penetrate and redirect my life?
22.  Whether or not anyone else cares, do I care about myself?
23. I now have a vast chunk of time all to myself– how can I use it? 
24.  What plateaus of courage and hope do I want to reach?  How will I reward myself when I reach them? 
25.  How valuable is my life to myself and those who depend on me? 
26.  Are my emotions holding me back from true living?
27. Can I now reconstruct my life and refocus myself without feeling like I am bandaged up for life? 
28.  Do I feel that “this too” shall pass?
29. Am I making a true effort to “let go and let God?”
30. Can I envision myself 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5 years from now a better person than I am now? 

 In summary, use these questions to help you climb out from the abyss of self-pity and find the ladder to a    radiant, more productive and outstanding “you”.  An ocean of love, joy, and peace and happiness awaits you right now!