How to Tame Your Melancholy

    Well, first you have to identify your melancholy’s gender.  It’s important to sort this out right off the bat, otherwise, you won’t approach it with adequate care.  Male’s just tend to be snippy because that’s their way.  They have issues with territory and possession, but they can be broken of that with training.  Females, on the other hand, are normally very withdrawn in their aggression, but, one out of four times, their tendency to lash out can be attributed to their hormonal cycle, to put it softly.  You should also make sure that you have identified the breed.  If it isn’t a melancholy then this whole regime is moot. 
    Determining the breed is simple.  Check for coloration, firmness of tone in it’s body and coat.  Green and off green are the predominant colors, though gray is also common.  Normally the musculature should be firm to the touch.  Outside of that, you’ve got to question whether it’s worth your time and energy to train.
    Once you have identified your melancholy, you’re ready to tame the beast.  This may sound like a daunting task, but, trust me, it isn’t.  When your melancholy puffs up, it’s mostly for show and intimidation.  Rarely is there any bite to back it’s bark and bristle.  Just stand your ground and make sure that you understand it’s just afraid for itself.  If it starts to snip at you give it a few firm slaps punctuated with the word “No.”  Make sure you’ve established who’s boss.  You’re the master in this relationship. 
    If all else fails, you can follow the standard American care regime: feed it drugs and hope for the best.