Men have never known how to treat their women right. This article should serve as an eye opener to many young men are in love but do not know how to treat their loved ones right.
Women astound us. Men have always wondered what it is that they really want. Some authors have gone to the extent of suggesting that women are from the planet Venus while men are from Mars. Irrespective of the planet of origin, men must learn how to treat their women right. The following are few pointers from my own experience that reveal how our girlfriends and wives want to be treated.
- Women love surprises – This may be obvious but at times we forget what surprise really means. Of course if you knocked her hard on the head she would be surprised, but that is not the kind of surprise they need. Do not go to her and say, I will buy you a car next week, instead, just surprise her with it and the mysticism that surrounds it shall work magic. However small a gift is, it should come as a surprise. Forget routines and build anticipation. Let her be caught of guard with your niceness, not crude behavior.
- Keep important dates in mind but don’t yap about it – It doesn’t help when you keep talking about her birthday, the anniversary of your wedding or engagement, but whatever happens, whether it rains or shines, remember these dates. If you forget her birthday, she will never forgive you for that. She might not say it, but this single act of neglect might actually prove unfruitful.
- Listen, listen, and listen even more – Our women love talking, and when they don’t talk, they do cry and when they cry, we can’t handle their tears. Men have always been disarmed by two things: The sight of as great smile, and …tears. Don’t make her cry, instead listen to her. Do not pretend to be listening while you read the day’s paper or watch football. Just listen; just listen to her however much you do not agree with what she seems to be saying. Sometimes we forget to listen, and this is our major undoing. Listening will show her that you care for her. It’s more than saying it everyday, and every night.
- Treat her with respect – Some men, most men in fact have never known how to respect their women. They need our respect, at least for the sacrifices they undergo for our sake. Do not raise a finger against your woman however aggrieved you maybe. Beating women, even a simple slap is a sign of emotional immaturity. You don’t benefit by slapping her, you don’t benefit by beating the hell out of her. She is an adult like you. Beating her is childish and can’t change and won’t change anything. So she cheated on you, fine. So you got her red handed with your best friend, fine. Do not make a scene. Sometimes ignoring her might work magic. Try it. Let her know that you are hurt. Make her see it, but whatever it is, respect her, respect her point of view, respect her freedom to do what she feels right, do not call her names or manhandle her, and last but not least, do not beat her however strong you may feel.
- Make love to her, not sexual intercourse – What is the difference, you ask. Am not good at graphically describing intercourse but some men think sex should be about finding that hole and darting in and out for a few seconds and once they gain their release, turning the other side and snoring their lungs out. Think of her needs too, prepare her for it, and sometimes just hold her, and let her drift off to sleep in your arms. I know you want it everyday, I know you would be comfortable with sex in the morning, sex at lunchtime and sex at night, but remember she has her own needs, and the need that overrides everything else is the need to feel loved, the need to feel appreciated, the need to feel admired, the need to feel indispensable. If all you need on her body is the hole down there, make one in the wall, or on the mattress!
- Make your union formal – I don’t just mean marrying her. You have been dating her for a week, for a month or for years. What is she to you? If she is your girlfriend, it has to be known to your friends and relatives, and that is how to introduce her. If she is your wife, she should be your wife both during the day and at night. Why? Because it is important that everybody that matters in your life knows your wife or girlfriend. Don’t introduce her as a friend, or worse still your workmate, or some customer, or simply, meet Alice, meet Sheila, or meet miss so and so. It hurts, for whatever your relationship status, it needs to be formalized.
- Share the household chores – For goodness sake, who said that changing that nappy is her responsibility? Who said that cooking your breakfast is her role as your wife or girlfriend? You are wrong. If you are tired because of a long day at work, remember she also gets tired after a long day at work! She isn’t different for being a woman, she is still human and needs to be treated so. Our mothers used to balance several things at the same time, I used to think at times that mine was superhuman, but looking back, I blame my father for reading the newspaper and watching television while she took care of everything around the house. Men must share the little chores around the house. We owe it to our women; it doesn’t make us less male, does it?
You may open the car doors for her, pull back the restaurant chair for her, buy expensive gifts, last the longest in bed and take her to fancy hotels; this doesn’t make you a man deserving to be the father of her children. The bar has been raised; quality is now the name of the game. Treat her right!