Seven Easy Steps to Become a Hero

Pride: My grandmother used to say, “Don’t pat yourself on the back; you might break your arm.” N’omi’s grandmother used to say, “Pride was the sin of the fallen angels.” It’s good to experience a sense of progress, and of accomplishment. But don’t allow yourself to get puffed up about it. That just makes it that much harder to accept the Coach’s next suggestion.

Negativity: You know enough to avoid general negativity. If you don’t, let me remind you: The surest way to stop any progress toward your goals is to start being negative and cynical, not just about yourself, but about anything. But I want to warn you once more against an even more insidious variety of negativity: Saying “no” to your Coach (see Chapter 27, “Shutting Her Out”).

Make it a policy simply never to do it. If she says something that sounds outrageously weird, thank her, and tell her you’ll think about it. If it still seems strange, open a discussion with her about it. Not everything she tells you is right; she may be lacking a vital fact or experiencing hormonal challenges.

It’s your job to protect her and cherish her, while taking what she says under consideration.

But if you cut off the flow of her help with any variety of “no,” you are in trouble. And if you make it a habit, you will do real damage to the relationship, and to your entire life.

Your relationship with your Coach, in some ways, is like caring for a plant: The plant may not complain loudly if you forget to water it; it may just quietly dry up and die.

GIVING UP: Don’t even think about it! There is always something better to do than give up. And giving up never makes anything better. If you’re really thinking about doing it, read the next chapter of this book on Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate.

Remember that you are a hero and you should never quit.