Surviving or Living?

It’s hard to think that some people believed you have never made the right decision…that for a long time now you’ve always been wrong.  Some people just makes you feel useless and incompetent – you just don’t know if they really intended to do it or they just don’t know that they are insulting you already.

They just don’t know what’s going on with you or what you really feel.  You remember the time when those people depended on you…your own effort was enough to provide what they needed…you’ve done a lot of things in the past that seemed to be long forgotten now – just because you made one fatal mistake…COMPROMISE.

There were things you thought you shouldn’t have done but you did anyway – you compromised.  There were things you feel you shouldn’t have given but you did anyway without asking anything in return – you compromised.  There were a lot of times when you should have spoken out yet you kept your mouth shut supressing that feeling inside – you compromised.

You compromised because you know that those people won’t listen anyway… I mean really listen and understand what you have to say even if it’s not the best thing but that they would agree with you just because.

You’re losing hope.  You don’t think that would happen in your lifetime.  sometimes you wish God would take you home or just take you away from this misery…BUT…it’s the one’s who loves you unconditionally and those you love are the one’s who still keep you strong to this moment (you realize that there are still people who would love you unconditionally).

You want to reach your dreams and do things without hesitation that you might displease someone.  You want to break free from the spell of fear.  You want to love someone who respects you and who will take you for who you are.  You want to go away from this misery – from people who makes you miserable…who only thinks they’re the only one’s who are doing the right things.

You want to fly free as a bird and pursue your own satisfaction rather than others.  To feel that you can still stand tall; to know that you can still love.

You don’t want to just survive…YOU WANT TO LIVE!!