The Art of Listening Part 1
by How to be a better listener.
Most communication problem could be avoided if one learned how to listen effectively. It is not easy to acquire the skill listening effectively but once mastered, it will bring a lot of benefits and could even make you rich! Here are a few ideas and suggestions that you find useful:
1) Be an active listener. An active listener is someone who ask questions about what is being talked about. Try using sentences like, “I heard that you’ve said, …Do i get it right?” Even though you are sitting and listening quietly, this may not be enough for the speaker to feel that s/he is truly being understood. A nod and “u-huh” occasionally helps too. Maintain eye contact with the speaker, but please, don’t stare into her/his eyes! Try nodding your head a few times throughout the conversation to show that you understand what the other person is saying. But please don’t lie. If you don’t understand, ask questions. Questions that could make you understand better. Just a word of caution though, you need to be aware of the emotional state of the person talking. Sometimes, it is better to let the speaker let his/her steam first before you start to asking questions.
2) Be aware of your own personal filters and triggers. Each of us is unique in every way. We are the product of our upbringing, culture, religion, life experiences and any thing that makes us unique. By understanding that that we are unique, we will able to realise that it could also be an obstacle to effective listening. Once you are aware of your own filter and triggers, you will be aware why you are turned off when people speak to you. As you listen, try to remain open to what is being said and withhold any judgement.
Who said listening is an easy task? But it is worth the effort.
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