Unresolved Grief and The Family Gamble
by The family gamble is when a family makes a decision if there is actually a loss of a family member. An example of family gamble is making decisions to become emotional ready to part ways with a comatose family member. Is there a chance of recovery? If there is a recovery, what can of quality of life is he or she going to have? Should I make funeral plans (Boss 1999)?
A researcher describes a father who came down with Alzheimer’s disease at forty years of age. His youngest son was certain that he would contract Alzheimer’s disease at an earlier age too. Thoughts of what kind of life he would have, or the life his own family would have if he chose to marry and have children (Boss 1999). The compromise he has to think about is almost impossible to fathom. Should he take the family gamble and realize that there is nothing that he can do to change his father’s situation? Should he grieve now and continue to live out his life that it may be cut short too?
Although the pain of losing loved ones was overwhelming, Jane came to realize that her family was feeling the same way too. This became of resource of support for Jane.
Emily came to realize that although the death of Carl and the baby was unavoidable and that the way her life was headed, she is destined to meet her maker. She informed her family that she wanted help for her substance addiction and was admitted to an inpatient treatment center. After a 30 day stay, she was returned home on the advice that she follows up with a family therapists who can check on her needs as well as the families’ needs. The family therapists also addressed the loss of Carl and the baby on separate visitation days.
When designing a treatment or prevention plan, singling out treatment and prevention efforts to the individual is virtually ineffective due to the multiple issues that is entangled with substance abuse. Without taping into unresolved issues, treating only the substance abuser still leaves room for sparks to fuel the cycle of abuse (Fischer & Lyness, 2005).
After initial consultation, the therapists discovers that alcohol and marijuana where often used by the parents when Emily was a child. The biopsychosocial focus applies to the description of Emily’s substance abuse. According to researchers, “a biological alcoholic parent may, among other things, (a) transmit genetic vulnerability; (b) model alcohol abuse; (c) foster the development of alcohol expectancies; (d) introduce stressors into the child and family environment, such as aggressive or violent behavior and marital disruption; and (e) distress the family economically and legally, placing the family in an impoverished and possibly dangerous environment” (Fischer & Lyness 2005, p.157). Emily’s past experience as a child being around drugs and alcohol influence what peers she chooses to hang around with in high school. With the open discussions, the Allen Family came to realize that they can modify their behavior and chose what stressors are relevant or irrelevant in their lives. Although the loss of Carl and the baby may be with them for a life time, they chose to remember them for the positive memories.
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Post CommentCHAN LEE PENG
On November 3, 2009 at 1:50 pm
Those who’re experiencing unresolved grief should get supporters who’re spiritually strong so that they can be prevented to involve in any negative act. Good piece! Thanks!
Chris Stonecipher
On November 3, 2009 at 1:54 pm
Thank you Chan! Keeping grief bottled up inside puts tremendous stress on the body. A spiritually strong connection helps tremendously.
Goodselfme
On November 3, 2009 at 7:22 pm
WEll composed with important info. With modern technology one can now resolve their thoughts and put them to rest with confirmed tendancy to be pre disposed to some conditions. I am thinking sometimes people don’t know how medicine changes at the blink of an eye.TX friend.
Ruby Hawk
On November 3, 2009 at 11:51 pm
Technology is growing so fast we never know what new discoveries will be made next year, but still its a hard choice.
ZuzannaM
On November 4, 2009 at 12:48 am
This is the hardest for me to deal. Death in a family or even my friends, boss, co-worker, family doctor…etc.. Glad you brought this subject for reading, had better understand how to cope with loss as such!
Thank you,
Zuzanna
kate smedley
On November 5, 2009 at 3:36 am
An excellent article Chris, grief is such a difficult area, I have lost family who were killed suddenly and also seen someone die from a terminal illness. Spiritual strength and faith are so important.
papaleng
On November 5, 2009 at 9:30 am
Another well-researched and presented article. good info. thanks for sharing Chris.
Lauren Axelrod
On November 5, 2009 at 10:43 pm
Those that experience grief should have friends like you.
qasimdharamsy
On January 4, 2010 at 11:07 am
well written…thanks for sharing….
Jenny Heart
On March 19, 2010 at 11:42 am
Agree with Chan. Need spiritual loving supporters. Excellent one!