My son came home from kindergarten with another scrape on his knee.

“It was Thomas, who tripped me again” he admitted.

Thomas was the bully of kindergarten and he had attempted to make my son’s experience as miserable as possible. He had punched my son, spat on him and issued numerous verbal threats. The school district had a policy of suspension for fighting and Thomas had been suspended several times and he was only five years old.

The teacher was unsure of how to handle Thomas. Many other students also had encounters with Thomas. My son was afraid to go to school. The administrator, Mr. Davis, lived in a haze of denial. I had to help my son stand up to this bully.

1. I told my son to walk away from Thomas whenever he was in the area. Even if it meant playing in a different playground area for a while. If my son was not allowing Thomas to play with him, then he was in control. Also, Thomas would most likely find someone else to bully.
2. If Thomas started approaching my son I told him to say in a loud voice, “I am not playing with you Thomas, leave me alone.” I wanted my son to project his feelings clearly so adult supervisors would hear, take note and help him.
3. I instructed my son to tell an adult over and over until someone eventually would listen to his complains about this student. Pretty soon, I rationalized the school would get sick of the constant complaining.
4. If no one on the playground was listening, I instructed my son to run to the office and tell the office staffs that he needed to call his mother for help. The administration did not wish to bring my attention to the problem. I had spoken with the principal many times about Thomas. I knew the principal did not want me meeting with him again.

The next few days passed by smoothly, but Thomas was absent Monday through Wednesday. On Thursday, Thomas was back to taunting my son on the playground.

My son walked away from Thomas and reported him to an adult supervisor. The supervisor placed Thomas in a “time-out.” After a few minutes, Thomas was back on the playground trying to bother my son. My son sought out more adult help. A teacher, this time, took Thomas to the office for the rest of recess.

But the problem as not solved. Thomas was released after recess. He walked to the class line to wait for the teacher.

Thomas was carrying a rock. He approached the class line and threw a rock only a few feet from my son. The rock hit my son just above his left eye.

Mr. Davis called me at work to tell me what had happened. I was livid.

My son was fine, but what could have happened? My son was not safe at school.

I picked up my son at school and I met again with the principal.

“What would you have done Mr. Davis if that rock had damaged my child’s eye?”

Mr. Davis looked at me blankly. He could not respond to my question. But he knew

I was right and the matter could have been far more serious.

The following day, Thomas was speedily placed in a classroom for children with

emotional issues. I was glad that Thomas could finally receive the attention that he

needed.

 
But most of all, I was relieved that this bully was no longer attending my son’s

school.

Bullying is a silent threat that often goes undetected. Students who report bullies are

deemed “tattle tales.” Many times school-aged children have to cope with bullies on their own. Bullying is harassment. Every school should have clear rules and consequences for students who bully.

Finally, parents should not be afraid to speak on behalf of the safety of their child.

Every school administrator knows that bullying is wrong.

 Some administrators choose to ignore the problem, until an innocent student is

seriously injured.

I urge you to investigate your child’s school policy on bullying. All students have the right to be safe in school.