Social Skills Taught in School: Do Adults Really Behave That Way?
by The mission of most schools is to produce well-rounded, good behaving young adults. Along with reading, writing, and math, children are taught social skills. Students must be quiet and must walk quietly in a single line. How many well-rounded, good behaving adults do you see following those rules? Are the social skills they are being taught in school really a means to producing independent members of the community? Or are they simply to teach the children they had better listen or else?
Of the greater American population of adults, how many work directly under the watchful eyes of a drill sergeant boss everyday? Some do, but most do not. The truth is most adults need to know how to manage their own time, deter distractions, and work effectively with peers. We should teach our students the skills necessary to become successful independent adults, not adults dependent upon rules, regulations, and the big bad boss.
When setting the classroom rules, or even the rules for your home, acknowledge who is responsible. Adults are responsible for setting the rules and modeling expected behaviors, but is the child who is responsible for following the rules. Understanding that adults can not force children to comply is key. Ask yourself, what would make me want to follow these rules? Chances are your answer will not differ greatly from the answer of the students. The children must realize it is their choice and in their best interest to abide by the rules. For example, I would like to receive a good education in order to have a good job when I grow up. Therefore, it is in my best interest to listen attentively to the lesson. I sure do like it when my friend takes the time to listen to my story. I had best take the time to listen without interrupting when she speaks.
By recognizing how rules meet personal needs, students will not only become more compliant but also more independent and responsible. If students have to be in class 6 hours a day and teaching socialization is a must, then it may just be in the best interest of everyone involved to approach the teaching of socialization skills in way that complements those used frequently in adulthood, rather than those used, hmmm… rarely at best.
Liked it
