Giving in

So I bought a new phone with unlimited text messaging and I’m not happy about it. I feel guilty. I had a phone. A working phone with a pay as you go plan. I got used to never using it. I was never contactable so yes a part of me does believe it played a role in my social life. So I asked them whether or not they would actually text me if I got the unlimited text-ing plan. Of course their selfish selves said yes. So my stupid self got it. Nothing has changed. I’m still alone. I guess that’s what hurts the most. Giving in for no reason, for people who don’t even care. Now I am making my parents spend money they do not have on things I don’t need. What do I have to do to feel loved around here? This is pathetic of me to care. I never cared. In fact I was proud to have a lame phone. And now that part of my pride is gone. It is like everyday I find something new to bring my pride even lower down. I have no friends.