Homosexuality and the Environment

Well, we’ve all heard about how the end of the world is coming because of all the homosexual people that are populating our country. Judgment will come and consume the earth just like Sodom and Gomorrah. Unfortunately, I’m not going to give my opinion on that. Instead, I realized something the other day. We should all be at least a little thankful for people wanting to have alternative lifestyles!

Here me out. Everything we hear now is about how the environment needs help, and how we’re undergoing global warming. At  the rate humanity is expanding we are going to run out of all our resources in x amount of years. It doesn’t matter that we know all this, because, supposedly, if we stopped polluting now it would still take several thousand years to reverse our damage. This seems pretty hopeless doesn’t it? Well, now I give you the cure! Same sex partnership will completely erase our problems in just a few decades!

How, you say? Think logically for a second. The basis of our environmental crisis is sheer population size. Now imagine if we could tremendously reduce the amount of population increase. Now think about the likelyhood of a gay couple having a child of their own….it would be a literal scientific miracle. So if the number of same sex partners continues to increase we will have a continued decrease of population increase. This will prevent resource shortages, excess pollution, and general problems that all us humans cause. This will benefit all of us, and if it actually worked would  be the greatest irony in human history where the people causing the most controversy save the planet.