I’m Not Perfect, I’m Just a Shemale

     People see us as a plague, most of them don’t trust TS when it comes to money issue. I found it very common that most convicted TS their case usually estafa, and robbery. Well I’ll let you think I’m cleaning my hands but I’m really not that, infact, I don’t want people especially those who were close to me, my friends and family, to have issue regarding money. It’s something I really hate. I’d rather see myself burn with anger about  social argument or something like that than lose people’s trust because of money- that most people vowed for.

    I always ask how two opposite sex fall inlove magically. It’s a common thing they attract or maybe started as friends. But to me, a Transexual, may seem impossible to find what they called true love. I was born in a country where most of us discriminated and although there’s a lot of organization fight to stop the abusing, insulting and discriminating against TS (transexual, gay, shemale whatever they call it, in tagalog its “bakla”) I still feel that normal poeple think we dont belong in their society. Well it’s fine but when you come to the point where the person you like has this opinion about us, it’s really hurtful and find myself believe it’s impossible.

    And for us to have a temporary high or a love we always wanted and always will just anybody else- we pay. Yes! in order to have the guy we want. We offer them something that they can refuse or they will ask. Sometimes they are the one who gives motives. We knew there’s a hidden agenda, we just blinded ourselves. We make believe that we found love, we told ourselves just because we see that guy taking care of us, text us everyday, asking how are we doing. Sometimes cook for us. Ask permission if they can go out with their friends not knowing going out with girls- real girls!. Maybe because we really want to believe, we love to see proof. Or maybe we settled our minds just for awhile from doubting and pain. I personally still don’t know the exact answers.

     We love to go out very late every night. Some of my friends won’t stop until they have books theirselves ( we called it “booking”) -a one night stand or affair that would last overnight. Usually we share one men, is it immoral?? Ofcourse but we love it, we just hate when a guy overprice us, after all they are the one that satisfy most.

    Gays and TS always present and participate in every beauty contest, it reaches us no matter how far this contest were. The good thing is we always supported our own kind base on what I observed.

    On the positive side, most of my friends love to be sorrounded by us, TS, and the poeple I knew. They love how we speak our so called “gay lingo”- a language that TS/ gay have created (even before I was born) and improving every year, I think every passing moments. We just love how we connect words from the other words or rhyming words despite of how far the meaning of each words. What matters to us is they sounded like.They love how we talk, how we act, how we give our opinion ’bout things and I can’t explain further with my word coz its limited. You should see us Filipino TS how we socialized with others.

    But the one thing that I’m really sure of is TS or gays can’t be a bestfriend to another TS or gays. I found it very to hard to accept but it happened to me twice. But still I’m hoping that It’ll prove me wrong. As I work on a relationship with a new Ts friend, she’s nice, a very good friend, something tell me and ,indeed, I felt it that she has a good soul.

    I’m just grateful that my bestfriend is a girl from childhood and our relationship as bestfriend is growing strong.