The ‘I can’t help it’, ‘I was born that way’, ‘Do you think I’d chose to be this way’, might be more of a denial than the person in the closet.

Modern psychology considers gender preference as a spectrum ranging from pure homo to pure hetro with the majority of people in between. This preference is not a choice, but acting on the preference certainly is.

Now the kicker: I prefer a womens body and beauty and a mans gentials. If it was possible, I would be that way, and so would my partners. I’m still attracted to both men and women, but that is my ideal and there are many like me.

So where does all the fit into these stupid black and white opinions? It doesn’t. Personally, I find that black and white arguments are generally used to support one form of denial or another. So as they say in Sweden…suck on that piece of candy!

I ask the question due to the various discussions as to whether gender is fixed at birth, whether there is an intellectual/genetic bias for one sex or the other; which would confirm the ‘born that way’ statements.

Bisexuality suggests that gender preference is a preference; not that you are allergic to peanuts, you just don’t like them…

The ‘born that way’ argument falls apart in the face of bisexuality.

The question can’t be easily answered. Yes, we can put a large number of bis into the category of gay but not ready to admit. And then there are those who just experiment, which can be removed from the statistic.

The question would fall on the adult person who has had; for example, X serious relationships with same sex, X serious relationships with other sex.

Too often one find the serious relationships are either hetero or homo; which would suggest the person is either gay or straight; while the frivolous relationships are with the other;

If sexuality is predetermined, then if you can be born to like the opposite sex, or born to like the same sex, then you can surely also be born to like both. While chromosomes determine gender (XX = Female, XY=Male) and present an either/or scenario, a gene can have multiple outcomes: We aren’t limited to 2 eye colours, hair colours etc, so why would sexuality be an either/or scenario rather than genetic.

If sexuality is not predetermined, then if your upbringing nurtured/conditioned you into attraction to the same sex or into attraction to the opposite sex, then it can also surely nurture you into attraction to both.

Either nature or nurture could be the case, or a combination of both, but neither option precludes bisexuality.

In response to one of the other posts above… some people who admit to being bisexual are gay but not yet prepared to admit it (to themselves or to others). Others are essentially straight, but have tried and not regretted, so don’t deny it. Others are genuinely attracted to both men and women physically. To others, the physical is meaningless – they are attracted to the mind first and then they accept the person whether the same or different sex.