We Need The Government to Help Us to Make Every Decision
by The sad, unfortunate truth is that most members of congress actually think that we are entirely too stupid to think for ourselves or to run our own lives. Maybe they’re right. No, I don’t think so.
So now a former representative of the United Pear Pluckers Union oversees and regulates the sale of apples and oranges; his former competitors. He now administers all of this through an agency. The bureau of fruity affairs.
Naturally I must now call them and asked them what to do. Not out of curiosity but because it is now a requirement. The person on the other end of the line answers and of course has to stop eating the apple she has stuffed in her mouth in order to talk to me. You see, even though they want to limit the consumption of apples and oranges of the average citizen, they don’t think that the same rules should apply to them. Obviously a rare phenomenon in government.
After giving all of my personal information away that will be entered into a laptop someone will eventually steal and get my social security number from, they give me the approval for one bag of apples. No oranges today. I say “what’s the difference?” But I guess that’s like comparing apples to oranges and I hear quite often that generally, as a rule, you shouldn’t do that. So I am given an authorization number that I am supposed to give to the person at the counter that will be entered into a computer for verification.
I get to the front of the line and pay $3.99 for the bag of apples and a minor fee of $20 to cover the various administrative costs, which happen to increase at 3 times the rate of inflation. So I put it on my credit card. It’s no problem because the government knows what’s best for me and they say that I should spend as much money as I can to stimulate the economy; even if I have to go into debt to do it. The government will print up more money anyway, so I’ll get it back. That is how it works, right?
Sure it was a bit of an inconvenience and sure it costs much more than it would have had the government not been involved, but I know with absolute certainty that I made the right decision; simply because it was made for me by someone who presumes to know what’s best for me. And if what’s best for me is to pay much more for something, with it taking longer for me to get, while jumping through numerous hoops to get it, then I must feel obligated to do my part and just conform to the will of the government. After all, they know what’s best.
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