Whining Politicians: Off with Their Heads

The British ‘legal system’ is currently engaged in a futile exercise of scapegoatism: A handful of MPs and Lords have to face trials over the expenses scandal while the majority of frauds and cheats walk away not only free, but free to whine about the ‘harsh’ new expenses regime.

Former Labour MP for Bury North David Chaytor is the first scapegoat to go to prison for a nominal 18 months. Instead of 649 people who should be removed permanently from the streets (and that is only counting the fraudster that sat in the Commons), a handful of former MPs are set up as scapegoats. Great legal system!

Instead, a majority of conmen, fraudsters, and criminals returned happily to their seats in the Commons to milk the system (and taxpayers’ purses) at their leisure. Not only that, they have the guts to continue whining about the new expenses system put into effect after the scandal and blather about how complicated it is.

Honeys, if you are too stupid to fill in an easy form, you’re definitely in the wrong place! Why don’t you go and look for a job in keeping with your mental abilities? Though I am of the opinion that no job existing will fit intellectual pygmies. The financial savings, though, would be immense; if they can’t fill in an easy form, they won’t be able to apply for (more) welfare.

There would be other solutions to the problem of complicated expenses forms, though.

The money saving solution: Scrap the forms completely; that would mean scrap the expenses completely. As these work shy individuals are overpaid by millions every year for doing absolutely no work at all, they can pay whatever little cost they really have to incur in respect to their office out of their princely wages. As they are mostly absent from their seats in the Commons or the Lords, they have virtually no costs to face over what they spend anyhow on their overblown lifestyles.

The solution to increase average intelligence in parliament: Replace the current undemocratic voting system by representative democracy with lists. Not because it is more democratic, but so you can get rid of the most stupid incumbents without triggering an expensive by-election (this probably would produce a replacement as stupid as the prior incumbent). With a list, an incumbent too stupid to fill in an easy form could be immediately replaced with the next on the list. The expenses form would become the test to find an incumbent intelligent enough to be able to find his chair without the costly help of a person able to read and write.

But all this is theory; it does not solve the problem that of the 650 members of the House of Commons during the expenses scandal, 649 should have been restrained from ever running for political office ever again. Instead, a few scapegoats face the judge while exposed criminals and self-admitted idiots run the country. Oh happy times, when the Queen of Hearts could just yell: Off with their heads!

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