WHY STUDY WASHINGTON, SIFU?

Because he was revolutionary! For furtherance of glorious ninja internet invasion, Sifu Dansac read all about famous revolutionary leader and everything that him do. Sifu discover many interesting things, particularly wealth of disinformation on-line. Much that is conventional history is very dubious, with little evidence; other stuff is very well documented yet generally debunked by historian and commentator. Equally, much that is alternative history and ‘conspiracy theory’ is mad ranting of paranoid loony nutter. Between two poles of conventional and alternative history lies the truth, Laui.

I READ SOMEWHERE THAT WASHINGTON WAS A MASON: TRUE OR FALSE?

Certainly it is true, Laui; Washington admit it himself in letters that Sifu find transcript of on-line. Any Laui with doubt at this point should go to search engine and just type in question; you will find all the evidence to prove beyond doubt that Washington, Paine, Jefferson and Adams were all Masons, along with most of the Founding Fathers. It therefore follow quite logically that American Revolution very much tied up with actions of Masons in fledgling America.

SO WASHINGTON AND HIS CREW WERE ALL ILLUMINATI?

That would be natural conclusion of some Laui, yes, however just because one thing is true does not mean that entire edifice of conspiracy theory stand up to scrutiny. In same letter that Washington admit being Mason, him deny membership of Illuminati. Just because him deny is not proof, but there is little evidence to suppose that Illuminati were active during American Revolution.

There is daffy theory that Weishaupt, historical founder leader of Illuminati, somehow replace Washington. Sifu call it daffy theory because it is and implore use of common sense: for Weishaupt, a Bavarian, to replace and impersonate Washington, is impossible because of heavy German accent of Weishaupt and heavy Virginian accent of Washington. Are Laui credulous enough to think that all of Washington friends and family, even him wife, could be deceived by sudden change in Washington voice, appearance, habits? No; it just plain silly. Added to that is records of Weishaupt dealings and movements in Bavaria throughout period of American Revolution.

BUT WASHINGTON DC IS BUILT AROUND ILLUMINATI SYMBOLS…
No it’s not. Sifu could take a map of any city on earth and start drawing lines on it, telling you this mean that and convergence of this street here with that square there is proof of massive architectural conspiracy. Far more concern to serious minded student is influence of Christian Conspiracy Theorists on-line, telling everyone that everything is somehow a plot to invoke Satan and the End of Days.

Get serious Laui, just for one second; Christian Conspiracy theory talk in very broad terms about what is ‘occult’, telling us that all ‘occultists’ worship the devil and that everything vaguely ‘occult’ is evil. This is plain nonsense; Sifu is expert in world mythology and can tell you for concrete fact that ‘occultism’ is highly complicated and diverse subject all to do with pre-Biblical religions of the ancient world. Any student of history should know that most ‘Satanic Practices’ were originated in the Malleus Maleficarum, or ‘Hammer of Witches’, which was witch-hunting handbook written in England by two monks who had never seen a witch, much less a Satanist, and probably never saw a woman. The whole edifice upon which common belief in witchcraft and Satanism is built can be compare for veracity to modern day tabloid; all those stories of orgies and bestiality were made up by pair of virgin monks too repress to masturbate; as a result, them pour out prurient fantasies into them writings instead.

Secondly, Christian conspiracy Theory make much of numerology, citing many ‘Masonic Numbers’ and ‘Biblical Codes’ in architecture and writings throughout history. Laui, there are dozens of numerological systems and they are all different; not one of them is linked to the bogus Satanism dreamed up by the Christian church, and very few of them are any more than hocus-pocus.

Thirdly, for Christians to talk of evil Conspiracy to bring about End of Days is preposterous; given that ideas of Armageddon are themselves cornerstones of Christian belief, along with the notion that Jesus is pre-ordained to win the big fight at the end of history, one would think that Christians welcome alleged approach of apocalypse. Reading rantings of Christian Conspiracy Theory, Sifu observe prevalent belief in powers of so-call ‘Occult Forces’; evidently, Christians believe as much in the devil and all his little wizards as they do in them own God.

LOOK, SIFU, MY RELIGION IS MY BUSINESS, ALRIGHT?

Fine, Sifu is magnanimous Kung-Fu Master, quite willing for you believe whatever you like. You want to think that George Washington, the father of you modern country, was Illuminati Conspiracist in service to the Devil , you go right ahead. Sifu just draw you attention to the hundreds of eye-witness accounts of Washington in prayer and attending church, and to all the quotes of him publicly beseeching God against the precisely zero number of times him invoke the devil. One might almost believe you would rather America not win Revolution at all.

FAIR POINT SIFU, GO ON…

To serious believe that evil Masons design Satanic symbols into the street layout of Washington DC is first to assume anyone would bother; to believe that, you must first accept and believe that these symbols posses mystical power, which is the same as believing in magic and fairies, and massively undermines any other evidence for conspiracy. If you believe in such silliness, it is natural you will see evil symbols everywhere you go; if you do not believe, then you would not even consider the possibility.

You Sifu much more concerned with blatant disregard for reality shown by many theorist on-line. Let us suppose that Washington and all him friends were indeed conducting a conspiracy… because they were; against England. To further suppose that they were Illuminati masterminding grand-plan for to control history however is stretch it a bit far; do not forget, Laui, that Washington et al were fighting a war. They had very few men, very few guns, very little ammunition, and many occasion no food or shelter, all the while contending with the might of Britain’s fully-armed and constantly reinforced professional army. Are we really to think, Laui, that while Washington was slipping about in mud, ducking bullets, gutting redcoats on him sabre, crossing Delaware River again and again in dead of night, freezing him arse off for eight consecutive winters… do we really think that while all that was going on, Washington have any time whatsoever for worldwide conspiracy? No, of course not, but then again most people still think Bin Laden is out there plotting world overthrow. Laui, Bin Laden is either CIA agent operating from comfy US base with all the comforts of home and modern technology, or else he is living in cave somewhere in Pakistan without even water to flush him toilet. From him cave, do we serious think that him is orchestrate worldwide Jihad? Seriously?!

WELL WHEN YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT…

Precisely. So where have we reach? Christian Conspiracy theory is bunkum because it is self-contradictory from start to finish. Illuminati conspiracy also bunkum; certainly there are Illuminati, certainly they could be thousand year old plot to dominate world, certainly they may have succeed, but most of evidence to support the idea is rubbish. Best evidence of evil conspiracy which for sake of argument we will call Illuminati is the state of modern world.

It is certainly true that royal families of most of world are closely related, inbred, even. It is also true that every president of USA, including Washington, come from richest tiers of society and that electoral system is designed so this should be the case. The big conspiracy, Laui, is Capitalism; rich few lording it over impoverished many. Anything else simply confuse the issue. Who are the Illuminati? Why, they the man who run Sainsburies and Wal-Mart. They are the man who run BAE Systems and CIA; they are the man who help George Bush rig him elections; they are the rich and the powerful who consist about 1% of human race. All this is plain obvious fact, best proved by quote from Theodore Roosevelt who say:

“Behind the ostensible government sits enthroned an invisible government owing no allegiance and acknowledging no responsibility to the people.”

What more proof do Laui need? Former USA president outright admit that ‘Illuminati’ run everything, yet still all Laui is ponder the question.

WAIT, IS THERE A CONSPIRACY OR NOT?

Of course there is, you think modern civilisation happen by accident? Obviously rich and powerful cabals have try to control world events in them favour since dawn of history, but key word her is try. Sifu have hear theory suggesting Illuminati control the weather, earthquakes, eruptions and sunspots. Just because ancient Egyptians invent batteries and light bulbs (which they did, look it up on-line) does not mean that pyramids were nuclear reactors; they might have been, but there is no evidence to say so, it just a theory.
Illuminati try to control world events and they do pretty well, but there is always random chance, there is always counter-conspiracy, there is always rivalry within secret societies between one member and another. To believe otherwise is to suppose entire planet utterly enslaved and human race is nothing but sheep, totally controlled and without free will.

BUT THE WORLD REALLY IS LIKE THAT, SIFU! ITS ALL A CONSPIRACY!

And yet here you are resisting, Laui, with the freedom of you mind. Mere fact that you ask questions proves that conspiracy is not all-embracing. Problem resides in fact that everyone attach them own fears and beliefs to personal image of Illuminati; Christian Laui think it all about the Devil come and get them, Patriotic American Laui think it all about Commie plot to overthrow them freedom, people in UK is all afraid of evil Islamist bomber, some people even think aliens and lizard people is in control, while $cientologists reckon the evil Xenu is the cause of it all… Laui, all these notions are silly.

Pure simplicity of truth make it difficult to grasp when there is so much complex garbage being flung in you face from every direction; base principle of Capitalism is that there is finite amount of everything and it must be portioned out. The people in charge of the portioning take more for themselves and become very rich because they are greedy. Naturally they want to keep them wealth and increase it, precipitating wars all over world for to claw back more and more wealth from working people. This is prove by suspicious absence of limitless energy sources so far invent by human race, including solar power, geo-thermal power and the research of Nikolai Tesla into atmospheric static electricity.

You want conspiracy, there it is; the conspiracy to keep entire human race addicted to limited and expensive fuels rather than convert decades ago to sources of limitless power that would make Capitalist system redundant. You worry about mind-control device? There is one in you living room right now Laui; it is called the TV. You want doomsday device? We already got nuclear bomb. You want super-villain hiding in bunker with finger on big red nuclear button? His name is George W Bush! You want conspiracy, there it is; the conspiracy that we live in a democracy, the conspiracy that our leaders are good and kind, the conspiracy that the all-seeing government will get you if you step out of line, the conspiracy that hell awaits anyone who questions the hegemony of faith and that God will save all true-believers tomorrow.

Notice how it always tomorrow, Laui, and never today? God coming tomorrow, we fix environment tomorrow, we do away with nuclear arms tomorrow, we give you solar power tomorrow, we cure cancer tomorrow, alien mother-ship collect us all tomorrow, revolution coming tomorrow… always tomorrow and never today; yet always same man in suit telling you always “Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow…”

All Laui know tomorrow never comes; loyal ninja know that Sifu always say:

The World Shall Hear From Me Again!