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Drug Diary – Christmas Day 2006

Not one of my best Christmas’s. I’m currently publishing some pages of a nearly seven year diary. This diary is a little insight into the daily life of an addict and their journey to getting clean. This page is dated 25/12/2006. My ex partner’s name has been changed for privacy reasons. Feel free to comment.

i suppose i should say merry Christmas, although it doesn’t feel very merry. the police were back at the door again last night looking for keiron. he was hiding in the bedroom. i thought the police would at least give him a break over Christmas. we had to sleep in the hallway on top of cushions so we could hear if someone was coming in the main door. i managed to hide some money from keiron so we were able to have dinner today. it was a bit awkward and i was constantly on edge when i was cooking, just in case the police came back to the door. it wasn’t the most relaxing Christmas day I’ve had. I’m only 16 years old and i feel like i’m 36. i got a few presents from my gran and grandad last night. I’m glad that i managed to hide enough money to get them a little gift set each. keiron got me a score to myself and put it in a Christmas card for me. i got him the same. (£20 bag of heroin each). i feel so ashamed constantly lying to everyone. no-one in my family even know I’m on drugs. they just think i haven’t been eating. well i suppose they’re half right. not looking forward until tomorrow as we have no money and there isn’t enough methadone for the both of us. i actually buzzed a tin of gas this morning so i could hang of before taking my charge (heroin). I’m hoping that the Christmas cards keirons sister has from his mum, will have some money in them so we can sort ourselves out. i doubt it though.

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  1. Martin Kloess

    On September 13, 2012 at 7:33 pm


    Well done thank you for sharing.

  2. Ruby Hawk

    On September 13, 2012 at 9:03 pm


    Thanks for the look into a troubled girl’s life. I hope you are doing well.

  3. smokychristine

    On September 13, 2012 at 9:37 pm


    It must be terrifying to wonder from day to day whether you will live through it.

  4. elee

    On September 16, 2012 at 6:22 am


    Thanks a lot for this :)

  5. Blake Black

    On September 22, 2012 at 4:58 pm


    Not just a piece of writing, a tiny portion of your life displayed in text, shocking but all real, bleak, but with a sliver of hope, i’m sending you my very best.

    Thank you for sharing such a hard part of your life. wow

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