Bully Induced Suicide, Bullicide
by If you are feeling suicidal as the result of being bullied (or really for any reason)… think again.
Bullies are mean, they really do not care about your feelings, or if they do it’s only because they get pleasure and power out of seeing somebody whose feelings have been hurt.
Sadly bullies exist in nearly every age group, from young children, through teens, and even into adulthood. Their method changes but their motivation remains the same. They look for power by belittling others, they look to get “friends” and have “followers” to make themselves feel important. In short, bullies are just as insecure as their victims, the only difference is the bully acts tough to avoid being targeted themselves.
None of this is important though if you are the victim and are contemplating taking your life.
At this point all you need to realize is if you kill yourself nothing will change. Bullies rarely feel remorse and if they do, they fight hard not to show it. In recent times where suicides have occurred as the result of bulling the bullies themselves openly laughed at the victims funerals. Read here.
You are dead, you feel no benefit from “teaching them a lesson” as truthfully, in many cases the bully may consider themselves the “winner” and in time will simply move on to targeting somebody else.
I write this as an adult who was bullied as a teen, and while I no longer have any contact with those girls, I do often see other grown men and women acting the role of a bully. They do not think they are bullying, but they are, it’s a learned behavior for them, and one your suicide cannot prevent, or change.
People who think of killing themselves often do so to escape, but occasionally may fantasize about what those who “drove them to it” will feel like. The suicidal person may even think “This will teach them”, but very often the bully only gains more power knowing how much control they had over you, and many will not feel responsible at all.
So many cases where people killed themselves as the result of being bullied did not result in the bully coming forward and admitting their role, quite the contrary.
If you are thinking of killing yourself because of being bullied think again.
- You are dead, no gain.
- The bully will continue to bully, no gain.
- Your family will have to “clean up”, morn and ask how they could have prevented your death, no gain, even if you want your family to feel bad that they did nothing, it’s too late, you’re gone.
When you get through it, and you will, you will be a far stronger person than any bully will ever grow up to be, because they will still have the insecure need to pick on somebody, you won’t have that need.
If you are being bullied in school, keep in mind the school may not be to blame, that bully was formed as a child, at home. Try to switch schools, find coping skills within yourself to learn how to ignore the bulling, as you get older, you may find comfort in understanding what the following phrase means “Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer.”.
The time we spend in school (which is when most bully – related suicides take place) is really small in comparison to the rest of our lives. Finding some way of survival is key, ending our life is not the answer.
Related Reading
Can the Media Address Bullying Differently?
Start Living your Life, Because there may be No Afterlife
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Post Commentdrelayaraja
On October 9, 2010 at 11:47 pm
Wonderful share…
Ethics0006
On October 9, 2010 at 11:56 pm
Nice Share
Anuradha Ramkumar
On October 10, 2010 at 12:40 am
An excellent share. Bullies are there everywhere.
GodsGrace
On October 10, 2010 at 12:40 am
Good Work
Ethics0006
On October 10, 2010 at 1:16 am
Nice Post
Jimmy Shilaho
On October 10, 2010 at 1:47 am
Bullicide? That is new to me, thanks for expanding my linguistic horizon.
Louise Silver
On October 10, 2010 at 6:29 am
I detest bullies. Lucky for me, I have never been a victim but for some reason over the years I have took great exception to it when I’ve been witness to it. I don’t hold back and have been known to actually scare the bully off or give them a taste of their own treatment by making them look stupid for their actions. I’m a peace loving person, honest, but when it comes to bully’s, it makes my hackles rise.
albert1jemi
On October 10, 2010 at 9:38 am
great post
Meg Smith
On October 10, 2010 at 10:08 am
Excellent post to help someone being bullied get through the trauma and make the bully take responsibility for his or her own insecurities.
Lucas Dié
On October 10, 2010 at 10:31 am
Excellent advice!
Linguistically, wouldn’t bullicide rather be the killiing of a bully? as in homicide …
irenen1
On October 10, 2010 at 11:42 am
Stand up to a bully if you can. Many times the bully is just a word tosser. The bully is more afraid of action than the one being bullied.
Amreen
On October 10, 2010 at 11:56 am
I think your advice is good for any person who is being bullied, young or old. I have recently heard of many cases of people commiting suicide after man years of abuse. I think it is disgusting for any person to treat another person like dirt. Good article.
Markeli
On October 10, 2010 at 1:30 pm
I can’t think of a more serious issue than life. Thanks for speaking out on this difficult (and sometimes tragic) subject.
Minister Marlene
On October 10, 2010 at 1:55 pm
Very important topic. Why should these kids feel so down as to kill themselves. They a needa talk from a Mom like you.
Minister Marlene
On October 10, 2010 at 1:58 pm
Very important topic. Why should these kids feel so down as to kill themselves. They a needa talk from a Mom like you. my son is well mannered and respectful so, of course he was bullied one or twice. But all the bully needed was a tidy, not too violent beat down. This kid threw a brick at my son.
Adrn0919
On October 10, 2010 at 6:02 pm
Very good article and topic. Life is so precious it is sad those that took their life felt there was no other solution. Your article provided good reasoning and advice.
JoeLopy
On October 10, 2010 at 6:19 pm
Hello there, Bullying is a terrible thing and your tips are very good. I am afraid I know what that is not just as a child…………………….It is incredibly sad to see grown up people behaving in such an ignorant way. I experienced it and that is just sad…………………..I am trying to address some issues at work now……………….however never suicidal. Life is too beautiful to be ruined by a bunch of sad people.
Take care. Joe.
Karen Gross
On October 10, 2010 at 10:23 pm
It is really harsh to hear about bullies laughing at their victims funerals, but attitudes are hard to change. Kids can be so cruel to each other, and they don’t see the value in the lives of the people they bully.
margaridab
On October 11, 2010 at 3:04 am
Bullying is one of the big problems in schools nowadays
TommyP
On October 11, 2010 at 10:21 am
A timely and well written article! Especially liked the section advising those who are bullied…
Yvonne K
On October 11, 2010 at 12:57 pm
I agree
Kazz
On October 11, 2010 at 2:54 pm
Terrible how far some people can go to even laugh at their victim’s corpses. Excellent share.
CA Johnson
On October 11, 2010 at 4:41 pm
I really enjoyed your article. It really is a shame that the bullying is getting worse and worse. I read that another teenager committed suicide because he was constantly getting bullied. This is really getting out of hand and it has to stop.
Cynthia Bartlett
On October 12, 2010 at 12:46 am
it’s sad. kids aren’t taught manners anymore. and some adults are so stressed that their behavior resembles bullying.
Goodselfme
On October 12, 2010 at 1:25 am
WEll done and I fully agree since I too had a personal experience, which I chose to live and enjoy life to the fullest.
crisdiwata
On October 12, 2010 at 4:59 am
Great advice. Thanks for the share. It’s just sad to know that there are some kind of people but we must accept it. We cannot eliminate them though, but we must not let them ruin our lives. They’re just some kind of socially insecured persons who do not know their exact place here on earth.
ishinimrod
On October 12, 2010 at 5:34 am
Very Nice Article
pattiann
On October 12, 2010 at 2:57 pm
Excellent article. M daughter got my revenge against a bully without killing herself. She went to school with this girl who was proud to hate her and did everything possible to make her life miserable.
After my daughter had been out of school 6 years, my daughter and I went to a restaurant. She was the host. She acts all friendly like she never bullied my daughter My daughter and I looked at each other and knew what to do. We entirely ignored her. We didn’t say one word to her.
RAJEEV BHARGAVA
On October 12, 2010 at 4:03 pm
a really superb article, Brenda. i went through this phase myself but stood up to the bullies. life hardens you as it goes by, but they will unfortunately always be there for underneath they are cowards with a bad upbringing intent on damaging a good persons happiness. this article is really helpful and i enjoyed it too. may i also congratulate you on appearing on hot content. well done!
Jerry Bradford aka Jerry Atrixx
On October 12, 2010 at 4:39 pm
Such a sickening symptom of our societal woes.
Outstanding article.
Datrev
On October 12, 2010 at 8:02 pm
Terrific One!
bala99
On October 12, 2010 at 11:45 pm
We have an organized form of bullying in collages, here in India. It is called “ragging”. It started as a harmless “get-to-know-each-other” pranks to a Frankenstein it is now. In the recent past it has become ugly. It pains me to see young people take their own lives. Thankfully people have taken notice and rules and bans are in place. Thank you for this share.
Bloom Again
On October 13, 2010 at 12:17 am
I agree with an earlier comment about the lack of teaching about manners. Amazing what has happened since the 1960s. The Bible used to be used in schools as a textbook. Too few children today know the “Golden Rule or any of the Ten Commandments. Sad state of affairs.
DAN MCHARDY
On October 13, 2010 at 2:29 am
Ahhh bullcide bullys making others suicidal… I hope you know what you’re doing to people all you bullys out there!
R.B. Parsley
On October 13, 2010 at 3:51 am
B,
Excellent article. These bullies that laughed at their victims funerals should have been dragged outside and beaten to a absolute pulp. Some years ago when I worked at Walmart in my community, the third shift was made up of a clique headed by the third shift manager and her boyfriend. Even though I try to get a long with everybody, I found myself being targeted by the clique. I tried to talk to the managers boyfriend on a few occasions, and one night I heard the manager say, I can’t believe he’s trying to be friends with you. A month later he and the manager had a lovers quarrel and he thought he was going to bully me. He took a swing at me, that got him knocked across the stock room. The manager did nothing about it. I went in the next night, and he actually apologized to me for attempting to bully me. After I knocked the crap out of him, I noticed everyone, including him, excluding his girlfriend, treated me differently. In fact he and I got to be pretty good friends ever since. But as far as the manager goes, about three months later she was sent to another store, where she was fired.It seems she had a problem with drugs. Bullying is a problem that should be outlawed, due to the damage it does. No one should have to tolerate being bullied… No One.
Randy
mo hoyal
On October 13, 2010 at 2:34 pm
This is a wonderful public service message and a very good article as well. I went through this experience in grade school and back then we didn’t dare tell on the bully, so for awhile it was very unpleasant to go to school. After grade school things were better, but this is a terrible thing especially for a child to go through and I would hope closer attention could be paid to those who do this in school now, and they shouldn’t be allowed to go to recess with others if that becomes necessary, but in our busy and over populated world of today, we all good to remain alive and well.
Best regards to you B!
749841692369
On October 14, 2010 at 1:20 pm
Bullicide is the perfect name for a documentary on bullying and how effect it is and how it destroys people.
Golchop
On October 14, 2010 at 6:19 pm
There are adult bullies too. Careful of who is around you.
Der Kommissar
On October 14, 2010 at 8:29 pm
Excellent and timely article B
Rump
On October 15, 2010 at 1:29 pm
Indeed, wasting our short and wonderful life for those lifeless brutes is just not worth it. Good share, Brenda!
sam9953
On October 16, 2010 at 5:39 am
I tread the whole article line by line and i am really happy that i read it. I have also gone through this phase and i am very happy after reading it. Thank you so much for this great article.
deep blue
On October 16, 2010 at 11:30 am
I have my share of being bullied back in childhood. Now the bullies had been bullied by life itself and they seem nowhere to be seen. A topic which brings back the good, old and tearful days, Brenda.
Will
mike2881976
On October 17, 2010 at 4:00 pm
In theory Bullicide would mean to kill a bully…?