Children with Special Needs
by I am not an expert. I am a mother of a special needs child. Although the journey has only begun I would like to share knowledge on where we came from, where we have been, and where we hope to go. This is Emilee’s story.
Just a Detour
feeling defeated we had to step back and reevaluate. With the help of a recommendation from the hospital Emilee’s services started again with more intense intervention, including a speech therapist, and an early intervention specialist. She started to do better with this level of intervention. Emilee has made large strides since then. She is now in special education preschool classes, and continues to show improvement each day.
What I have learned
The path is not easy but the motivation is easy to find. Flawless and innocent children look to their parents to be their advocate. I want to share with other parents what I have learned on this journey so far.
This is still your child
Do not let your child be “Mary sue and her down syndrome”. Its a hard balance to find between that and denial but be patient and cognitive of this. Do not let a diagnosis change the way you view your child.
Do not treat them differently
Hold your child to the same standards as their siblings. Accommodate them as necessary, but still expect the best from them. Do not make them vulnerable.
Be an advocate
Do not assume your doctor, or teacher, or principal, etc. knows everything. Do the research, get an second opinion, do whatever it takes. When you are meeting for the IEP if you want something changed speak your mind. You know your child best, and as a parent you are the best resource their is.
You will grieve
Hopes, dreams, and uncertainties for your child lay ahead. Ideals are shattered.You will feel guilt, self pity, sadness, depression, anger and eventually acceptance. Then you will do it all again. Like so many things in life it is a journey not a destination. Let this natural process happen.
You will blame yourself
You will reanalyze, reevaluate, and find something imagined or real you could have done different. This is normal. Just remember it does not change a thing, nor does it help your child in any way. Allow yourself this time but know chances are this is not caused by you.
These are the basics I wished someone would have told me. Everyday is a suprise. Some are better then others. I know my daughter is a blessing and I feel empowered to think god chose me for her. Good luck to all.
My view on the autism and vaccines debate:
http://www.socyberty.com/Disabled/Autism-and-Vaccines.338983
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Post Commentlindalulu
On November 16, 2008 at 5:59 pm
What a heart felt article about your life and what you and your family are going through. My prayers are with you all.
mizterman
On March 21, 2009 at 10:25 pm
I have to tell you that I know what your going through. Well, through the eyes of my mother. Each and everytime I see Forest Gump, I think of my brother. The scene when he was with that little girl and he was running with those braces. That was my brother. My mom was struggling trying to take care of him. Not know how, she put him in a foster home.(just for a little while)It help her, he learned a lot and when he came home, he was doing so much better.
I understand everything you are stating. I hear the love you have for your daughter. I use to work with this agency out of Eugene, OR. (Trips Inc.) I was a chaperone for them, I learned so much from the kids ages (16 and up) This is so true, “Do not treat them differently” I know it hurts some times but there is a reason for everything. Can I tell you a secret? Come closer. Being a parent is a blessing, a gift from God. You have been choosen. Love on your daughter, she feeds off of you. What she learns from you she will cherish for the rest of her life.
God bless you Frost.
PS
It’s not by chance that we met. I WILL keep you and your family in my prayers