Early Adulthood-6

12/21/1993-nightfall

We sat at the bar on the roof of our hotel and discussed my bisexuality. Me and my brother,we were just having a drink and trying to figure out how to deal with my parents, my aunt and the therapy situation. This wasn’t supposed to be the thing you do in New Orleans while having a bloody Mary, but it just transpired.

I sat on my stool and gazed out at the river. A large boat covered in lights sat by the River bank and emitted a small plumb of smoke. My brother’s words began to fade as my eyes followed the smoke up into the sky. I had that feeling again of being in a room full of people and feeling all alone.

I thought of Tysha and Mark again and wondered if they were still fighting.

12/22/1993

Today was filled with walks on the quarter, cemetary tours and visiting the best cajun restaurants around. The mood was lighter during the day and the weather was beautiful. Boats glided along the river just off the banks as Jazz and blues wafted through the air. Children squealed running from the candy shops. I smiled and trotted alongside my big brother, I chatted away about silly things and our usual sarcastic and deep comedic thoughts.  The thing I can remember the most about the day was the overall calm and optimistic air. There were no dark corners , no regrets and definitely no thoughts of care for things back home. It was a good day.

12/22/1993-nightfall

This was the our last night in the Big Easy, so we decided to walk the quarter until we couldn’t walk anymore. I had my reservations about this place after dark but I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to have some fun. We went from pub to pub, bar to  bar and cafe to cafe sipping on drinks. Our walk along the quarter became a shamble and our laughter got louder. We turned down a new street and then another. We passed groups of people here and there led by pale tour guides. Every one of the palid creatures caught my eye and smiled at me and everytime, my smile dropped, as did my gaze. Other people were shambling as well and tended to bump into us and drunkenly apologise.

A shop caught my brother’s eye and we ducked into it. I recognized the smell immediately, it was a deep rich insence, very similar to a cardaman/patchoulie mix. I inhaled the aroma and sighed. The air was filled with light smoke and I could hear drums in the distance.