Married Bachelors – The Curse of The Middle East
by A look at the people living away from their families for extended periods of time in an attempt to provide for them.
Having worked in Dubai for a couple of years, I couldn’t help but notice that not too many people are fortunate to have their families living with them.
The expatriates or foreigners account for almost 80% of the population and in that the Indians are a mighty 50%. More than half the people among them do not qualify to sponsor their wife or children as they do not meet the minimum salary criteria. These are what we know as the Married Bachelors.
In addition to this there is another 20% of the population that live in collective labour accommodations away from the city. There must be close to 100,000 or more people living in this camp and they are all of one gender – MALE. . The area is known as Sonapur which translates into “The Golden town“ but the sky is always gloomy out here like the hearts of its residents who live far away from their loved ones.
More about Sonapur some other time. Today I want to tell you the story of the married bachelors. I had a colleague who came to Dubai immediately on getting married and recently celebrated 25 years of his marriage – most of which were spent being single away from his wife. Every year he used to travel back home and spend a month with her which in effect meant he had spent just over 2 years being close to her !!!!. No wonder his marriage survived – neither of them got to know each other at all !!!
I have also known guys who would stay back at work for 2 years so that they could avail of a 2 month vacation. “Are you planning a trip around the country side with your family”, I used to ask them & pat used to come the reply:” No sir, we want to have a baby and this extra time will help”.
On their return they used to wait expectantly for any good news & if it didn’t come – it would break their heart as it meant a wait of another 2 years. Just the news that the wife was pregnant was reason enough to celebrate and distribute sweets to colleagues. It was another matter that by the time they returned home to see or hold their kid it would be a year old. It is sad but even before they get an opportunity to connect with their child it would be time to return.
“What kind of a life is this ? “ I used to ask myself – are these few extra dollars worth the pain of separation from your family ? I would say “No“, but what choices do they have – providing for their loved ones is all they care about and so what if you have to live the life of a Married Bachelor in the city of Gold – so be it .
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