Ncaa Basketball: any White People Left?

     I watch a lot of basketball, especially this time of year.  I love the game, the excitement of the tournament, all of it.  Something happened tonight as I was watching Kansas State’s thrilling double overtime classic over Xavier that caused me a great deal of pause.  My 11 year old son was watching with me, and asked a perfectly legitimate question.  Are there any good white players?

     I started to list them off.  Larry Bird, John Stockton…. uh…. yeah.  And as I gave it some thought, I realized that he had made a point.  There just aren’t a whole lot of white guys playing college basketball.  And as I thought about it, I realized that the racial breakdown of sports was pretty telling.  Basketball is mostly dominated by black people.  Watch the tourney games from this year.  The only white guys who don’t suck either play for Duke or a #14 seed. 

     So we see that in basketball, black people dominate.  Football isn’t quite so lopsided in the racial difference, but it’s still there.  Baseball seems to be closer to even.  Boxing?  Name me one white boxer other than the two Russian brothers.

     So why is this?  For whatever reason, the sports that require the most athletic ability are dominated by black people.  How come?

     So I got to digging.  And came up with a few answers. 

     I’m sure this is the part that will get me called a racist, but these are facts.  The reason that black people dominate in athletic events is…. lions and white people.

     Yeah, you read it right.  White people have had it, as a whole, pretty good.  Living in houses with no immediate threat of being eaten by anything.  There weren’t any lions in Europe.  And so, as evidenced by the physique of the average white guy, we got soft and fat.  Simple evolution.  Black people came mostly from Africa, where for generations and generations, they had to run around killing things to eat.  And all the while, not be eaten.  Evolution kicks in, and makes them stronger, faster, more coordinated.  Athletic, in other words.

     Then, a few hundred years ago, the now fat white people decided to start taking black people out of Africa and bringing them home as slaves.  And they were, in no uncertain terms, *ssholes.  The actually bred the slaves.  Big strong men were bred with big strong women to produce bigger, stronger slaves.  And that just ended, what, 150 years ago?

     So the bottom line is that the answer is simple.  Evolution and breeding.  Now there’s a heritage we can be proud of.   Evolution made white people soft and fat, and black people athletic.  Simple science.