Pregnant in a World with No Real Men
by This is an old chestnut I know, but it needs to be dealt with once and for all.
Someone please explain to me why pregnant women are left standing on buses and trains, whilst able-bodied men sit back and pretend not to see them.
As a member of the ‘club’ myself, I have yet to be offered a seat by a man. I’ve been dangling from the bars with my belly pressed right up against their nostrils, and they’ve remained planted in their seats, normally with eyes tightly shut. The eyes shut thing is a classic; it’s as if, as soon as my belly wanders onto the train, seated males spontaneously fall into a coma.
Women, on the other hand have shown themselves to be far more gracious, frequently jumping up to offer a seat. Recently when a woman stood up for me, I loudly pronounced, “thanks, but I don’t see why you should give up your seat when there are plenty of men here who could do the same.” I thought, that should shake them out of their apathy. Well, guess what? This was followed by absolute silence, in which the entire carriage squinted up at me as though I were some novel curiosity, and not a single male rose to his feet. As the kindly woman had now fled leaving the seat vacant, I figured I ought to at least grab it, lest some other burly Neanderthal leap in.
Men, what is the problem exactly? I’ve heard the old song about sexual equality, but it’s okay to discard that stupid notion when it comes to pregnant women. Oh, and in case your tiny minds can’t figure this out for yourselves, anyone on crutches would qualify for a seat too!
So please, if you’re not prepared to exhibit basic manners, then at least tell me what goes through your heads when a pregnant woman looms over you, threatening to poke out your eye with her protruding navel, as she is jostled about the train?
Perhaps there is something in the water that has caused your testicles to shrivel up or maybe your intense high fructose corn syrup diets have provoked a heinous genetic mutation to the Y chromosome, because when I look down at your pathetic, indifferent faces, I don’t see men, I just see failures and losers, and I want to puke.
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Post CommentAndAnotherThing
On November 19, 2010 at 5:35 pm
Eight months pregnant, she gets on the train and goes to sit in the only empty seat next to a young man.
“I’m sorry” pronounces the man in a very posh voice “but I’m saving that seat for my friend”
“Is your friend a bad mannered idiot too?” asks the heavily pregnant woman as she takes the seat.
The young, posh man winds his neck in. Perhaps it did him some good. Perhaps finding out he was a bad mannered idiot was a life changing incident.
bigpapadan
On December 2, 2010 at 5:08 pm
Annabelle – Allow me to offer you an apology and a possible explanation for the limp examples of maleness you have encountered. We are not, all, ill-mannered idiots. Unfortunately, many of those who carry the necessary equipment to qualify as males are in fact, sub-male. They weren’t taught about respecting women or, to my great dismay, do they actually even like women. You scare them.
Not to sound sexist, but, come south ma’am, you will find that more than anywhere else in America, we truly admire, respect and adore the female of the species.
lxdollarsxl
On December 2, 2010 at 5:17 pm
I also like bigpapa apologise for the males you have come across, maybe they were dropped on their heads at birth and have lost their sense of chivalry. Many will claim as you say because of equal rights between sexes that you get what the female of the species wants but thats just a big cop out and does not hold water unlike a pregnant lady (please forgive the pun). I hope in future you run into men with manners.
s j tubrazy
On January 10, 2011 at 11:22 am
apologise from the male