The Dangers of Urinating in Public

Urination has hit the headlines again – why we can’t have something prettier to read about I do not know, but there it is. This week an English Judge retired to consider what penalty should be imposed upon a student at Hallam University in Sheffield, a certain 19 year old Mr Philip Laing of Maccelsfield (yes, we know who you are), who was caught urinating on a war memorial while in a drunken stupor. He was caught on camera giving a poppy wreath a golden shower, and with Remembrance Day fast approaching and body bags returning from Afghanistan this was most certainly ill-advised. Public sensibilities have been offended and now Mr Laing is probably passing rather a lot of urine while he waits to see if he is going to jail or not. Apparently he is deeply embarrassed. 

Which is more embarrassing Philip, being photographed peeing on a poppy wreath or everyone knowing that you wear pink undies?

Then in County Cork, down at the bottom of Ireland, a shop keeper fed up with people urinating on his shop front has rigged up a device that sends an electric shock along any stream of urine that is aimed at it. Ingenious. I am sorely tempted to sit up all night just to watch! The council is mulling over the suggestion of appointing two Urine Wardens for the town to catch offenders.

And it can become quite serious, this habit of urinating on other people’s property. Earlier this year 22 year old Mr Himanshu Sharma chose to relieve himself outside a petrol station in Delhi. The owner challenged him and a fight ensued in which the station’s armed guard shot Mr Sharma dead. Piddle at your peril.

UPDATE 26-11-09 The Macclesfield Piddler escaped a jail sentence and was given 250 hours of community service.