The Impact of a Complete Smoking Ban

What would people waste money on instead of cigarettes? Yes you’ve got it, food and alcohol. Do you really want a load of drunken fat people instead of thin cancer patients? Don’t answer that one. And think of the lost business newsagents would have, with a back shelf to fill with yet more jars of midget gems and we certainly don’t want that.

What about formula one? How on earth could that great sporting event which attracts thousands of people across the world continue without the advertising revenue from the cigarette companies? Can you imagine the scene where the cars would be sponsored by a supermarket’s healthy eating range, speed past the yoghurt drink banners? It just wouldn’t happen.

Many people believe that this country is becoming a ‘nanny state’. Now many non-smokers enjoy an alcoholic drink every now and again. Imagine if you went to the pub on Friday and ordered your preferred ale and a packet of your favourite, but greasiest crisps and all you got was a mineral water and a bag of fruit. You wouldn’t be happy, in face you would be straight down to London with your banners and signs and march about like idiots refusing to work again until you got you’re alcoholic fix.

People believe alcohol is safer than smoking, well that is not entirely true, how many people have had their last draw of a cigarette and decided climbing a lamppost was a good idea or beating up their best mate would be ‘funny’

So just think for a minute, if your attention span lasts that long, just think what would happen if an outright ban was introduced. Non-smokers, of course, would be delighted, but the smile would soon disappear of their faces when the government realise that cutting out smoking just isn’t enough.

Alcohol, food containing more than 0.1% of fat, cars, TVs, fun and leaving the house would all be banned for being dangerous for our health.

So let’s come to a compromise to prevent the ludicrous situation of a complete smoking ban occurring, why not try having different sides of paths for smokers and no smokers or why not give people an option, stay in your town and stop moaning or move planet. Now, you’re probably thinking that is a bit unfair, but you’re like everyone else, concentrating on the negatives; I mean if smoking was so bad why do people do it? And don’t say it is because they are addicted! Who else has fingers as yellow as Marge Simpson, who else smells so bad that no-one talks to them? Who else has such bad breath that people hang up on them on the phone?

I think I’ve made a very good case for smokers in this article, you’re probably not agreeing though. You’ll be saying all he did was ask rhetorical questions. OK, so maybe I did but there’s nothing wrong with that, is there? I’ll finish this article properly after I’ve had a smoke.