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10 Hilariously Weird Laws of England

These are really strange and funny laws which are still around today. Hope you enjoy.

Hilariously Weird Laws of England

Well… England has always had a lot of history, especially when it comes to dealing with other countries, that’s why some of these laws do include the rest of Britain. The reason these laws are still around is simply because it is too much effort to erase them, it is a lengthy process involving 4 stages of approval.

There are a lot of these funny laws still about too many to mention, so I am going to include 10 of the ones I think are the funniest. Sit back and let history teach you…hehe.

  1. Eating mince pies on Christmas Day is illegal throughout England. Oops! Lock me up, maybe the only day where pretty much everybody will break the law.
  2. If a postage stamp with the Queens head on is placed upside down it is counted as Treason, which still carries the death penalty. Hmm do you think the Queen knows of this law?
  3. In the lovely place which is York it is still legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and arrow, on all days except Sundays. The Scottish best stay away.
  4. It is still very much legal to shoot a Welshman with a crossbow, only after midnight and if done within the city walls. Hmm looks like the Welsh should stay away too.
  5. It is very illegal to stand within one hundred yards of a ruling Monarch if you are not wearing any socks. What is they smell really bad dose that count.
  6. It is illegal for an MP to enter Parliament, wearing a suit of armour, this obviously stops duels from happening. Doesn’t seem to stop the shouting though.
  7. Interestingly enough it is illegal to die within the houses of Parliament. What’s the court hearing going to be like if that happens?
  8. The law allows any pregnant women to relieve themselves in public. The law sure is disgusting.
  9. It is illegal to wrestle an untrained bull in public. I would certainly like to ask them why they would want too.
  10. It is against the law to allow your pet to get it on with any pet of the Royal House. This carries the death penalty and you will be executed. Not your pet YOU!.

That’s the ten, but I do have one more which I think is hilarious.

It is in fact illegal in Ireland for Bee’s to trespass. Yes that’s right those insects which fly around everywhere. I would certainly like to meet the person who is able to train Bee’s to intentionally trespass.

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User Comments
  1. dibdab

    On March 16, 2009 at 12:17 pm

    Haha nice article

  2. ayaBee

    On March 16, 2009 at 11:35 pm

    this is really funny ^__^ … keep writing

  3. lindalulu

    On March 17, 2009 at 7:50 am


  4. Lucas DiƩ

    On March 20, 2009 at 2:56 am

    funny, but they are quite logical laws compared to what the Tories and Labour have done to this country in the past 100 years ;)

  5. Ronda

    On November 13, 2009 at 5:43 pm

    This is all rubbish, I Live in leeds England none of this is true…

  6. Mark

    On December 4, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Whilst rather romantic and good for a giggle, these are urban myths.

    Treason no longer carries the death penalty. (The abolition Act revoked all laws for which transgression carried the death sentence.)

    In the same vein, new laws brought in at the same time covered ALL homicide, whether Irish, Welsh, Scottish, Jew, Christian, black, white, or orange. It’s illegal to kill anyone… full stop.

    Subsequent laws have also superceded certain elements such as the Public Indecency laws and Intent to Cause Moral Outrage which would prohibit defacation in public by anyone, pregnant or not.

    The mince pies thing is only one element of a long dead set of laws introduced by Oliver Cromwell in 1644 which banned Christmas… yes it really did happen. They were recinded in 1660 when the Puritans gave up on trying to stop the population munching forbidden baked savoury goods in the middle of winter… I think they thought it was a waste of militia resources!

    They all were true at one point (except the stamp – that’s just a myth), but haven’t actually been legal statute for many years.

    Not exactly a law, but to show that we still make ridiculous legislation (this one’s a Labour jem), the Tax Avoidance Schemes Regulations of 2006 makes it illegal not to tell the taxman anything you don’t want him to know – but you don’t have to tell him anything you don’t mind him knowing!?

  7. Elf

    On May 19, 2010 at 4:21 pm

    Stop spoiling it, Mark >: I was just getting cheered up by finding that we had some stupid laws too…

  8. Dom

    On November 9, 2010 at 5:00 pm

    Its not illegal to die in the houses or parliament just not convienent to. As a few hundred years ago, if you did you had to have a state funeral!

  9. cheese

    On January 11, 2011 at 11:01 am

    i like the way that people think that just because we live in england we know all the laws, most of these are true but they aren’t practised anymore and it is certainly legal for a pregnant woman to relieve herself wherever she chooses (even in a policemans hat!)

  10. kay

    On January 22, 2011 at 9:01 am

    i live in england and most of these arent true!! and some of these were used like centries ago and definitly not used now xD

  11. I'm not arrogant, I'm right.

    On March 13, 2011 at 8:25 pm

    Yes these may not be used now, but they are still statutes. You cannot be punished for disobeying a statute however because it only has the force of law if you consent to it – I know it seems silly, but you can only be punished for disobeying a statute if you agree to being punished… I do agree with Mark too, a great deal of these are just old wives’ tales

  12. Anony Mouse

    On March 18, 2011 at 5:38 pm

    Ronda, Namer guy and Kay

    You are embarrassingly ignorant of the history of the land in which you live and should just crawl under a rock in the U.S.A.

    You’ll fit in perfectly there – They pride themselves on their loud-mouthed ignorance

  13. vickylass

    On January 9, 2012 at 3:40 pm

    Well, I did break the law then by stuffing myself with mince pies at Christmas when I lived in London. That was an imaginative article. Keep them up. Thanks for sharing.

  14. Karen Gross

    On January 11, 2012 at 8:07 pm

    Hilarious collection, whether enforceable now or not. I have heard the one about how a policeman is obligated to offer his hat to any pregnant woman who needs something to go in. Where are all of the cops when you really need one?

  15. Rarity HIll

    On April 9, 2012 at 10:50 am

    You should try our country which does not seem to have no laws at all.

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