Finding a Healthy Balance

Most people live their lives out of balance, myself included. This is bad for our mental health. Sometimes a life out of balance is more comfortable for us than one in balance. That does not mean that it is the correct way to live. We have gotten use to living out of balance and have relied on a crutch. I spend my out of balance life by spending too much time on the computer and not enough time directly with my family.

Some people spend their time out of balance by spending too much time at work.

Some people spend too much time in front of the television.

Some people devote themselves to their children so much so that their own identities are lost.

Some people are addicted to something that consumes their time, be it porn, religion, gambling, or drugs.

Some people never say “No” to a request, and have lost themselves by trying too hard to please others.

Finding out what is off balance in your life is often easier than changing it and getting back into balance.

Most people can admit to themselves that they spend too much time doing one thing when they should be doing something different, but breaking that habit is difficult. Sometimes people find comfort in a pattern and cannot break free. This is especially tragic when the pattern is broken for them, as when a parents entire focus is their child, and the child moves away from home.

People get defensive when confronted with the obvious truth, that they are not spending their time where it should really be spent.

photo by author

Children’s most formative years are birth to age five or six. A large number of children are raised by day cares rather than their own parents. Parents will deny any long term damage took place to their child as a result, but few ever ask their kid: “Would you rather be home with me or at the day care?” Why would a three month old baby rather be at a day care than with their own parent? A day care is NOT a necessity if a family is willing to put the emotional needs of a child ahead of their own need for material things. Find the balance.

Before you know it your children will be grown and gone, but this is not a reason to smother them. Parents who are too devoted to their children, spending every evening taking them to events and lessons, will not only exhaust their children, but will also find themselves lost when that child is gone. The empty next becomes a frightful place to be when the persons whole reason for being is gone. These people need balance now so they do not fall over when their pillar is gone.