Honesty: Is It the Best Policy?

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I have always led my life believing it is, but oftentimes experience has shown me, that when I am honest, without rude or mal-intent, people’s feelings get hurt, relationships break up, and sometimes things become irreparable.

I always try my best to preface my straightforward, matter-of-fact personality to people I believe care about what I have to say. I say this because I know how sensitive people are as a whole. We are all sensitive. We all started off as babies in this world that cried, laughed and smiled instinctively; reacted without thought, reacted spontaneously to our true feelings. And, there is nothing wrong with being sensitive. To be sensitive is to be human.

As we have grown older, however, slowly society begins to teach us the difference between “appropriate” and “inappropriate” behavior: how one should respond to specific situations, telling us that if we act differently, we will not be accepted, or we will be disliked, scorned or even ostracized. Be liked, or be a black sheep – the alternative for most outweighs the potential risks.

While some of these learning tools are essential to social health as a whole, there is still much gray area to be had in any situation. Society teaches us more than naught to “be nice” and this often entails refraining from speaking the truth. This can, of course, can curtail many uncomfortable situations and hurt feelings, but it can also delay, mislead, and even completely create a false facade about a situation or a relationship. Spare a lover’s feelings for the moment and prolong an inevitable breakup or tell the truth and save each person time and a more difficult heart break that is sure to come with each day that passes?

When people fail to tell the truth, it is bound to affect other areas of their lives and eventually the person or situation that it deals with down the line. This is why, among many other reason of course, I believe, we have so many divorces, why so many people turn to “alcohol” the “elixir of truth”! Why so many people smoke, because in the end they don’t feel like they can be themselves. They don’t feel loved for who they are, they are trying to feel free, and they don’t feel anyone truly cares about who they are, because no one really knows; and, on and on the reasons abound as to why people continuously choose to turn to unhealthy life choices.