Woman-uals: What Manuals Would be Called If Women Were Meant to Read Them!
by Five "WOMAN-uals" I would actually be interested in reading!
If women were meant to read MAN-uals – they would have named them WOMAN-uals!
That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it!
To my unique (twisted?) way of thinking, when something is deliberately named MAN-ual, it belongs to that hallowed group of ‘MAN-things’ that wo-MEN need not be privy to – and have absolutely no interest in!
MAN-things such as: MAN-boobs, MAN-caves, MAN-ifolds, and MAN-iacs – to name but a select few!
And, at the top of that list? The dreaded MAN-ual! To us girls – it’s all just a bunch of MAN-ure!
Recently, I purchased four bar stools: Nothing too complex, one wouldn’t suspect! Imagine my shock and dismay when I realized that the bar stools came with a stupid MAN-ual SEVEN pages in length. Now, I’m pretty sure that this MAN-ual instructed me as to when to inhale and exhale – but, alas – the picture that would have indicated where slot A was so located that I could have inserted screw B – was so tiny as to render itself – and me – useless!
And, that was just Step One! Can you say TEQUILA? Or, scream it? I know I can!
Not that I should have been surprised, mind you.
If there is any possible way to complicate an already complicated situation – a MAN-ual will find a way to do it! They can’t help it – it’s just the nature of the beast.
Here are a few ‘WOMAN-uals’ I would love to peruse:
The WOMAN-ual on how to assemble the perfect shoe collection!
The WOMAN-ual on how to manufacture a slimming silhouette!
The WOMAN-ual on the finer points of power shopping!
The WOMAN-ual on the complicated issue of choosing the perfect spa!
And, last but not least: The WOMAN-ual containing the closely guarded secrets regarding how to get said MAN in your life to pick up said MAN-ual and actually put said bar stools together – before you both lose the dexterity necessary to climb atop of one!
Is it not exhausting enough that we poor wo-MEN have to deal with ‘MEN effect’? MEN-stration, MEN-tal illness, MEN-aces, MEN-ial wages?
Come now – lighten our burden, boys! Make us proud of the MAN in every woMAN!
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Thanks For Stopping By! Y’all Come Back Now Ya Hear!
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Post CommentTruthIsNow
On December 22, 2011 at 3:54 pm
The concern I have is in the MAN ufacture of a slimming silhouette…other than that, I’m with you on this. AND, you probably could have popped those stools right together if you’d simply put that manual in a closet somewhere
Jay F. Samson
On December 22, 2011 at 3:55 pm
Haha, great article! I honestly never read the manual when I have to assemble something.
And I LOLed at Menstruation. How ironic!
Shaunak Vats
On December 22, 2011 at 3:56 pm
Haha. Gr8 article
sumit13
On December 22, 2011 at 4:08 pm
nice post
Wrath Warbone
On December 22, 2011 at 4:11 pm
Thanks for lightening up my day! Very entertaining.
LoveDoctor
On December 22, 2011 at 4:12 pm
LOL. You made me laugh with this one all the way through. Do you know that I can\\\’t stand reading manuals. Every time that I buy a new cell phone it comes with that freak-in manual. I seriously dread having to read all that stupid lingo. And my DVD player, I\\\’m still waiting for my brother to come over and check it out. I want to start doing my yoga workouts from my house.
LoveDoctor
On December 22, 2011 at 4:13 pm
Sorry for those stupid parenthesis. not sure why they always come out when I type. Triond glitches I suppose
prsol46
On December 22, 2011 at 7:11 pm
Nice work, gotta love it!
PHILLY DREAMER
On December 22, 2011 at 7:14 pm
This is so sexist, but I love it anyway. LOL.
ittech
On December 22, 2011 at 10:34 pm
interesting post
stonecutter
On December 22, 2011 at 11:44 pm
lol!
hartnana
On December 22, 2011 at 11:57 pm
Karen, you so make me laugh…
amit13
On December 23, 2011 at 12:32 am
That was hilarious. lol
dazzlejazz
On December 23, 2011 at 2:22 am
You are so funny!! Very clever stuff – and if women came with a manual don’t you just know men wouldn’t bother reading it anyway.
(Because real men don’t need instructions – apparently!)
KittyK
On December 23, 2011 at 4:14 am
As for me, I never use those MAN-uals…
Rosettaartist1
On December 23, 2011 at 6:37 am
It all sure bears thinking about though!
ivaylo2009
On December 23, 2011 at 2:18 pm
Hi great thoughts about men and woman.It was so funny to read about.
girishpuri
On December 23, 2011 at 8:19 pm
nice share
erwinkennythomas
On December 24, 2011 at 6:33 pm
interesting
FX777222999
On December 26, 2011 at 8:42 pm
We are MAN-kind not wo-MAN kind…
Val Mills
On December 28, 2011 at 3:44 pm
You know, that first comment above makes so much sense. Loved this, hate manuals.
ittech
On January 3, 2012 at 7:24 am
Thanks for the very informative article
Very good sharing. I like it.
ittech
On January 4, 2012 at 6:45 am
very heartening write up thanks
Kristie Claar
On January 10, 2012 at 1:55 pm
Love it!
tenraj
On January 21, 2012 at 12:08 am
very interesting.. thanks for sharing