The Measure of a Man

Since the end of the Industrial Age, men have lacked proper male role models. Pampered by our cushy white-collar jobs, our hands had become soft and our will has turned to mush. We have become the proverbial ‘yes man’ of the corporate world – lacking a spine, slithering around with a knife behind our backs, looking for someone to stab so we can climb the snakes and ladders of financial success. Perhaps we think, “Maybe the girls will like me now that I have my cool new car and luxurious bachelor’s pad.”

Where are the real men of yesterday? The ones who worked hard all day till their muscles burned; the ones with blisters on their hands and calluses on their feet, the man that women swoon for at first sight? The answer is, “They’re all dead, Jim. All that’s left is us backstabbing, spineless, slithering yes-men.”

The real men may be dead, but their lessons from the past, live on. Let’s learn from our forefathers, what it means to be a man’s man. 

#1 A Man Must Be Bold
In Chinese philosophy, a man’s body composes mainly of Yang chi – the essence of male energy, representing vigour and vitality. Yang is forceful, the aggressor, and symbolised by fire and heat. Women on the other hand, compose of Yin chi, the cooling, receptive energy that surrounds everything. Yin is subtle, the receiver, and represented by flowing water.

Being a man, it is your duty to represent the essence of Yang chi. There is no time for beating around the bush, being too shy to ask for what you want, and being unsure of yourself. You have to be bold; it is your duty to be bold. You are the Yang, the aggressor. If you want to know a woman, you have to make the approach. You can’t possibly wait for her to make the approach, she’s Yin. She’s the shy, receptive one who is waiting for you to approach her. Let her be the Yin, don’t try to reverse roles and be the shy man who can’t even say ‘Hi’. I’ve never heard someone say, “Hah, he’s such a wuss for thinking she would even talk to him…” What you will usually hear is, “Wow man, you’ve got guts! I wish I could do that.” 

Women are attracted to men who can be their pillar of strength, someone they can lean on, a shoulder to cry on; boldness is a representation of that inner strength. You can define boldness as ‘the courage to act’, turning your fear into strength, accepting rejection and pain as a natural consequence for daring to achieve your dreams. 

Boldness also applies to business and life in general. The British Special Air Service (SAS) has a famous motto: “Who Dares Wins”. If you’ve got the brains, the guts and the tenacity, then chances are, success is yours. Listen to what German Philosopher, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe said, “Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” 

#2 A Man Must Live with Honour
Honour is a virtue of the Gentleman. Having honour means that you commit yourself to following a specific set of moral guidelines. People trust an honourable person’s word as a guarantee of future moral performance. Nowadays, we sometimes use the word ‘Integrity’ to represent honour.
Learning to live with honour will make you more of a man than ten years of corporate snakes and ladders can. Your promise must be a solemn commitment that you will keep to, no matter what. Your word must be as good as gold, if not better. 

Building an honourable reputation is no easy task. It means total commitment to upholding your integrity and living your life by defined moral principles. If you are successful, your good name will spread. People will recognize you as a trustworthy individual, whom they can count on to take care of the largest responsibilities, and entrust with the most confidential secrets. Taking on more responsibilities and secrets, can raise your life to new levels of prosperity and plenty. But be warned… if you ever breach that trust by committing just one selfish or perverse act, what could take you a lifetime to establish, you can destroy overnight