A Michael Jackson Fan

I had never in my life had an idol. People would ask me if I had an idol? My answer would be no and that is because I so loved myself and so believed in myself that for me , myself should be the Idol because like me one would ever be created and what I am to do with my life no one is going to do it.

That all changed one morning in June when I found myself weeping so much at the death of what was to become my Idol.

What is an Idol to you and why do you so admire ‘Him’ or ‘Her’? Do they have something that you wish to have ? Did they do something that you wish you had the courage and the ability to do? Do you wish that when you grow you will be like them? Do they give you courage to continue living? Do you feel attached to some part in their lives? Do you think that you have something similar , something that you can associate with them?

Michael Jackson’s death was one that left an imprint in my life. It left a shadow of sadness, of  love, of guilt for other people failure’s in giving a bad name to an innocent being for the sole reason to take away some millions of money from him.

Would this world ever, ever, learn. Will it ever learn to love?

Some people are born to the world to give love, to produce feelings, to teach the world what it is to feel love and Michael Jackson was one of them.

From a very young age he amused the crowd by his sense of  knowing , of giving, of wanting to share what he had….The joy of love. The joy of love that resided for ever in his heart.

I’m not writing to give a short biography of Michael Jackson for I did not study that much about his biography. All I have is a bit of knowledge from coming home every night to search the web and find about Michael Jackson. Seeing his music would relief my sadness, my deep sadness of his passing.

I don’t know about other Michael Jackson’s fans but I myself felt that he was part of me , part of all of us. I didn’t know him personally, yet I felt his love encompassing my every being. If I didn’t know this man how is it that I felt so in love with him, so saddened by the news, so largely affecting my life.

I see concerts of him singing ’Man in the mirror ’ and I feel a rush of pain, cry without control and even the crowds seem bewitched by Michael , all of them cry uncontrollably and fainting. There is without doubt a thrill of power, magic in the sky when Michael is present.

I feel jealous when I see people hugging him, people getting on the stage hugging and kissing him. I wish I was there, wish I was older , wish I had power to go I one of his concerts and feel the thrill of all. 

Michael was a great spirit indeed and we ( the fans miss him so much). You won’t believe me but sometimes I pray to God hoping that Michael would hear me and pray that I may have courage to stand the pain of not having Michael with us anymore.

Moreover how do I get over the pain of the world ? The way Michael was treated by the world. Accused of false accusations. How can one accuse such innocents I don’t know and I’m not really interested in knowing. Imagine a four year old abusing another four year old? Michael had a mind of a child. You can see it by his gestures, by his body language, the way he spoke, the way he sang. You can see that he was a true man. A false man will always get noticed by some thing or another. A true man will always be true. No rubbish can be found around him. Only that he is slaughtered with but not his own.

Apart from the great accusations Michael was also accused of not accepting his race whereas the truth is not that. Michael had an health case named Vitiligo where the skin gets patched.

No doubt that Michael did plastic surgery and maybe creams to look better. But who wouldn’t in his case?  Does that mean that he hated his race. I guess no! Just because he wanted to look better like every other human being doesn’t mean that he denied his race.

If it was so….. Who cares …. I thought that humanity is to look upon great persons not on their private lives but more on what they gave to society . What they produce, rather then with whom they are going out with , what they are doing to their skin, how are they wearing and that nonsense stuff.

Michael was also accused of dangling his child from a window of a hotel. Accusations were made against him where he was described as
getting slightly mad and that he was not fit to raise his children.

The truth is Michael was in a hotel with a well known presenter. Fans where gathered near the hotel shouting “ Show us your baby Michael”.
Innocent and strange as he was he showed the fans his baby.

I mean how low can humanity go in order to degrade his fellows from living a peaceful life? Just tell me : How low can one go ?

It is now the 8th of November 2009 and a rush of pain still lingers on. I still feel a deep void knowing that Michael Jackson: The king of Pop is not around. However sometimes I feel that he is more around then ever. For when he was human he was available to those who where near him who had the great opportunity to see him, to touch him. Now that he is in the spirit world he is accessible to all of us.

I never was a huge fan of him. I never loved him like I love him now.  I never ever felt his presence. Yet now I feel him. Four months had passed and never missed a day not hearing Michael Jackson’s music.