Arnold Really is a Pig!

ARNOLD REALLY IS A PIG

” Men are Pigs!” were the last words spoken by the commentator at the end of a segment on the Arnold Schwarzenegger Revelations story. Well, he was right.

Because he was born in 1947, after January 22nd, like Hillary Clinton, Dave Barry, and Stephen King amongst others; Arnold Schwarzenegger is a Pig. As a matter of fact, in Sinostrology (a term I coined for Chinese Astrology), he was born in the year of the Fire Pig — like me – and that explains a whole lot about Arnold’s “bad” behavior. See, those born in the year of the Pig have a “wait” problem.  When we see something we like or want – we want it all and we want it all right now! If we have to wait, we get upset and then we throw hissy fits.

A few years ago when I heard about the incident where Arnold was accused of suddenly reaching out and touching a woman’s breast, I grinned, because I understood exactly what happened to him.  He saw a gorgeous breast, every fiber in his Piglet body wanted to fondle it, so he did.  That’s how Pigs behave — especially fire Pigs, since our emotional dynamic is that of fire; constantly changing and dancing on the prevailing winds, completely transparent, and immediate. We live in a constant state of “right now!“

Though he wasn’t a Fire Pig, Ronald Reagan was also born in the year of the Pig. He showed Pure Piggyness and startled everyone with his bluntness when he blurted out “The Russians have been outlawed. The bombing starts in 10 minutes” into an open microphone, while preparing for a press conference. He thought it – he liked it – so he said it. That’s the Pig!

Another prominent quality of the Pig personality is a devotion to honesty. We tend to tell it like it is – even if it means trouble. We despise lies and liars so I’ll bet poor Arnold suffered constant pangs of guilt all those years that he kept his love child a secret from Maria and most everyone else. And since Pigs are extremists in everything they do and feel, you can bet his guilt was extreme. That’s probably why he finally revealed the secret. He just couldn’t take it anymore. The burden of deceit became too heavy for even Arnold to schlep around inside himself.

Pigs see the world as an infinite, all-you-can-eat buffet table, covered with a gazillion different dishes. We’re willing to try anything once. If we like it – we Pig out on it! If we don’t like it, we spit it out, then avoid it forever more. So the Pig’s philosophy is that of the Epicurean. The updated version is: “We’re not here for a long time – we’re here for a good time. Find yourself a whole lot of “good for the senses” stuff and gobble it all up immediately. Generally, when we’re called to task for our gluttonous behavior, we have a great excuse – we can’t help it — we’re Pigs!

Arnold’s always been known as a womanizer. Now however, we know to what extreme. Hopefully, he’ll garner some sympathy from other 1947 babies who know how hard it is to deal with the nature of the beast that wants it all — the natural qualities and foibles of the Boar personality. After all, he’s just human despite all the hype; and more importantly – HE’S A PIG!!