Lord Ashcroft Caught in Typing Error Shenanigan!

It has recently became into the public knowledge that Lord Ashcroft has a special tax status, which means that he does not have to pay income tax on his foreign income.

However, in a recent exclusive interview, he has stated that it’s all a big mistake; “I think it was a typo. I said that I didn’t have to pay for my taxi journeys, as one of my friends owns the company. Somebody read it, and thought that it meant I didn’t have to pay as much tax!”

David Cameron is said to be filing a lawsuit against Logitech, the company that made the keyboard the error was typed on. He is claiming that it unnecessarily damaged his chances of winning the general election, and a badly made country may well have ruined the economy of the whole nation. The owner of the taxi company, Lucas Brigstocke (brother of the famous comedian), has stated that Lord Ashcroft has been misrepresented by the media, and that typing errors are the single third most dangerous threat to western society, after terrorism and obesity.

This has prompted the labour party to state that should they remain in power at the next general election, they would nationalise all the computer keyboard companies, so everyone would have an equally wonderful keyboard, apart from MPs and party officials, who would be provided with an ergonomic management keyboard on expenses.

The keyboard industry is in awe at this move similar to the actions of a dictatorship.

Lord Ashcroft is not commenting, afraid that his comment would be mistyped to say that he was exempt from the forces of death, as is Peter Mandelson.

Image via Wikipedia