Mr Ga-Ga

So, rumour is Lady Ga-Ga is really Mr Ga-Ga. So what? Let’s over look the obvious self-seeking publicity angle of such a rumour and consider the advantages of a young man adopting a female alter ego. Unless, you live in a land where they think that the tea cloth is an acceptable form of head wear, you’ll have to agree that the days when women had to fight for equal rights are long gone. Indeed, everything is easier for women, no more so than in the world of pop where looks and not music are the most important factor for females. Slip into something slinky and preferably see-through and you can have a voice like a crow gargling toothpicks and still feature on MTV. The Pussy Cat Dolls, Suga Babes, Girls Aloud. I could rest my case but I won’t. Men have actually to be good at music to be pop stars. Now, I’m male, so it’s true I’d rather listen to a Pussycat Dolls’ video with the sound off than have front seats at a Elton John concert but the wee fat man with the dodgy hair-do can actually play the piano, write his own songs and sing – sort of. And it’s not just Pop. The world of sport is the same. Somehow women, who can’t seem to invent their own sports (nagging has not yet been adopted by the Olympic Committee) have managed to infiltrate all manly past-times from golf to soccer, rugby to boxing. Why? They’re not any good at them. Why is there such a thing as women’s running? There is fast running and there is slow running. You can either outrun the sabre-tooth or you can do that strange windmilly thing with your legs and end up as cub food. And yet we’ve been brain-washed into not only thinking that somehow women’s sport has validity but that it’s on a par with the male variety. Women’s tennis is like watching the men’s game in slow motion, albeit with better legs. They play three sets instead of five and are paid the same prize-money! Imagine that. Yes, I only work a three day week but I’d like to be paid for working five! With opportunities like that who can blame Mr Ga-Ga for shaving his legs and strapping on a pair of falsies?