Peter Andre Calling to Get Katie Price Into Another Jungle Challenge
by It is only natural after to want to watch the ex-wife suffer harmless but then again vile, smelly and putrid humiliations after an acrimonious divorce. That must explain Peter Andre’s huge telephone bill…
One explanation for Katie Price being picked to do five Jungle Challenges in five consecutive days is that the public have taken a dislike to her following her very public separation and divorce from Peter Andre.
Why the Public Dislike Katie Price Now
We all watched Katie Price aka Jordan in the fly on the wall documentary which followed the couple up until their disastrous, expensive wedding and from there to a married life from hell. We are still watching, jaw dropped, as she parades intimate secrets about life with the cage fighter who reminds people of a certain age of Plug from the Beano. Most of us don’t really like her and it seems that nowadays she’s only the heroine of young girls with problems who are growing up saving for their first breast enlargements when they reach 18 years of age, because they want to be like her, having fallen for her hype that she is the epitome of beauty.
Anything for Publicity me
Image via Wikipedia
Why the Public Liked Katie Price Then
Four years ago when she went into the jungle to live it rough and join in the humiliation of celebrities which the public so enjoy, Katie Price was well liked. She had some class despite her brass. She resisted the advances of the love struck Peter Andre and we forgave her the body dimorphic syndrome that ensured she was always under the knife of some cosmetic surgeon or other. She was a girl from a relatively under privileged background rolled up with more than a touch of English eccentricity. No matter what the obsessed, axe grinding media did to bring her down we supported her… she was harmless… but watching episode upon episode of her spousal abuse we fast went off the sandy beach.
What Katie Did Next
The name chosen for the fly on the wall documentary (to besmirch the name of documentary) has us wondering all the time: “just what exactly will Katie do next”. Essentially, the answer is “anything for publicity”. Hence it was once the documentary featuring Plug from the Beano, recently it was announcing she will be going to Afghanistan to entertain the troops – (What’s she going to do? Hire herself out as a Bouncy Castle?) and currently its becoming the first B lister to enter the jungle in I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!
The Public Will Vote Katie Price to do Every Jungle Challenge
It is now safe to say that the public will vote Katie Price to do every Jungle Challenge there is while she’s in the jungle. It is our way of punishing her for being so horrid to sweet Pete (Peter Andre). We were tempted (as the title of this article suggests) to write a spoof piece about Peter Andre sitting at home pressing the redial button all day to ensure as much as possible that his ex drama-queen wife gets covered in fish guts, cockroaches and every other sort of disgusting gubbins. But that would be cheap and we’ve had enough of cheap.
Image via Wikipedia
Our Present to Peter Andre
The public are giving Peter Andre a present and saving him one hell of a telephone bill. Unfortunately the penny will drop and Katie (who is convinced that she is still a favourite of the British public really) will get the message and quit the jungle – you mark our words!
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