Tiger Woods, Jaimee Grubbs, Rachel Uchitel: Pics and Why He’s a Pig

    Is Tiger out of the Woods?

     Surprise, surprise.  Tiger Woods admitted this morning to ‘undisclosed transgressions’.  (translation:  he cheated on his wife).  And all I can do is laugh.  I wrote an article a week or so ago pretty much predicting this:  Tiger Woods is a Pig.  Ironically, I recieved a pretty good amount of unhappy mail ove it; I was called everything from a racist to a judgemental fool.  But I was just following the old adage… if it looks like a duck…

     But, as they always do, he came out…. with a bit of help…

     So the squeaky clean Tiger really is just a pig after all!  It never fails, folks.  Celebrities are, as a general rule, two things… arrogant and stupid.  When you’re as high profile as Woods, the world is watching!  But fear not.  As I said, he’ll be on Oprah soon, still another ratings bonanza, he will repent and toss off a tear or two, whine about the pressures of being rich and famous, blah, blah, blah.

     Here is his statement:

“I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves. I am not without faults and I am far short of perfect. I am dealing with my behavior and personal failings behind closed doors with my family. Those feelings should be shared by us alone.

“Although I am a well-known person and have made my career as a professional athlete, I have been dismayed to realize the full extent of what tabloid scrutiny really means. For the last week, my family and I have been hounded to expose intimate details of our personal lives. The stories in particular that physical violence played any role in the car accident were utterly false and malicious. Elin has always done more to support our family and shown more grace than anyone could possibly expect.

“But no matter how intense curiosity about public figures can be, there is an important and deep principle at stake which is the right to some simple, human measure of privacy. I realize there are some who don’t share my view on that. But for me, the virtue of privacy is one that must be protected in matters that are intimate and within one’s own family. Personal sins should not require press releases and problems within a family shouldn’t have to mean public confessions.

“Whatever regrets I have about letting my family down have been shared with and felt by us alone. I have given this a lot of reflection and thought and I believe that there is a point at which I must stick to that principle even though it’s difficult.

“I will strive to be a better person and the husband and father that my family deserves. For all of those who have supported me over the years, I offer my profound apology.”

     Thanks for clearing that all up for me, Tiger.  I didn’t realize the you are, in fact, the victim here.  Now please blow it out your arrogant ass.  You make a living playing a game because people are willing to pay to watch you.  In return for this adoration and the millions upon millions of dollars you spend, you live in the public spotlight.  So don’t whine to us about your privacy.  There are peoplein this world with real problems.  Don’t whine to us about your privacy.  Perhaps you shouldn’t be a pig.

     But I understand.  Celebrity life is tough.  Which absolutely justifies this:

     I only regret that this will have no effect on your livlihood, Mr. Woods.  Your arrogance in this matter only demonstrates a blatent lack of class.