Stoicism: Beyond Pessimism and Optimism

“You can’t always get what you want,” sang the philosopher, Mick Jagger, “But if you try sometimes you just might find you get what you need.”  There is some wisdom in that, if interpreted rightly.

God knows we live in a world where we don’t always get what we want, and sometimes that’s even a good thing – I thought seriously about entering the priesthood at one point in my life and through the rearview mirror can plainly see what sort of disaster that’d have been, for example. 

But the last part of that lyric is a problem, too: Do we get what we need?  Can we, really?  Interpreted literally, the answer is a resounding, “No.”  It’s just too optimistic a thought because that would mean either everything I actually wind up with was what I needed (highly questionable and disturbing), or that if I just tried a bit harder, things would work out in a satisfactory manner (a more Pollyannaish conclusion is scarcely imaginable).

But maybe the line could be interpreted in a way that would make some sense.

In this world, there are things and states of being that are desirable and there are those that are undesirable.  If we could have our choice in the matter, we’d have a life filled with the desirables and devoid of the undesirable – that would seemingly be “best.”

For instance, a long, healthy life is desirable.  And, in fact, if I could simply live forever with no discomfort and illness, perhaps that would be even more desirable – there are scientists even now who spend their days working on therapies to bring this allegedly happy state into reality. 

A fine reputation is desirable.  To be loved, loved well, and loved often is desirable.  An unlimited supply of wealth and freedom to do as we wish appear desirable.

The opposite of each of these seems undesirable – no one really wants a life that is short, sickly, friendless, devoid of a lover or two, plagued with a poor reputation, physically impoverished, and spent in some form of slavery or subservience.  This is obvious enough.

If we each made a list of things that seem desirable to us, that list would contain commonalities with most others and dissimilarities based on our own tastes and preferences – maybe part of the list would be universal and the rest personal or culturally specific.