Stoicism: Beyond Pessimism and Optimism

One should not be so attached to anything material – such as wealth – that when Fortune or bad judgment or theft removes it, one is truly ruined.  Loss of wealth should be taken the same way as the gaining it – with an even temper.  One is who one is with or without money, and one should not allow who one truly is to be deeply affected by something as truly external to one’s worth as money.

“The god within you should preside over a being who is virile and mature, a statesman, a Roman, and a ruler; one who has held his ground, like a soldier waiting for the signal to retire from life’s battlefield and ready to welcome his relief; a man whose credit need neither be sworn to by himself nor avouched by others.  Therein is the secret of cheerfulness, of depending on no help from without and needing to crave from no man the boon of tranquility.  We have to stand upright ourselves, not be set up.”  (Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book III)

What we need is self-possession and self-control, and these come only by commitment to high standards, such as serenity and justice and honor and courage, mercy, generosity, forgiveness, understanding, wisdom.  These are what a rational being needs in order to live well as a human and not only survive as a slave to things that come and go and change and torment us.  Anything more than values such as these are things we desire to make our lives pleasant.  But our real happiness doesn’t depend on anything that can be taken away from us, and that includes any of the possible pleasures available to us in this life, pleasures that can just as quickly leave us or be stolen by time and accident and the misdoings, misunderstandings, or weaknesses of others.

“You can’t always get what you want. 

But if you try sometimes

you just might find

you get what you need,”

as the song goes.   And there’s some wisdom in that worth considering.