The Freedom of Consensual Slavery
by A look at the psychology of consensual slavery in the BDSM lifestyle for women raised in the day and age of feminist movements and the sexual revolution.
There are many images that come to mind whenever anyone thinks of the word slave. Most of the time the word itself is used in a negative context in reference to being forced to behave in a way that one does not wish to behave. It is a word that references a person that is under the complete authority of another with little to few rights of their own. The definition of the word has been put forth as having several meanings, one of which would be “a form of forced labor in which people are considered to be, or treated as, the property of another”. There is much stigma attached to the word itself since the days of the slave trade that was abolished in this country upon the closing of the civil war.
So many different meanings can be addressed and yet I find that they are not what come to my mind when I think of the word slave. Upon hearing the word or thinking of it I am filled with warmth and a gentle joy deep in my heart. You may want to ask, why would anyone feel that way? I will tell you happily. It is because I myself am a slave. Not only am I willing, but I am an eager one in my service to my Master. You see there is another meaning to this word that I have come to treasure so. You may in fact find it a truly ironic meaning, for I have come to see my own slavery as the only form of true freedom.
How could this be? You may be thinking to yourself, surely this girl is mistaken and confused in her use of language. But no! It is true! I see my slavery as freedom indeed. You see, it allows me the freedom to behave toward my Master in the ways that feel natural to me when it comes to how I relate to the man I love. I respect Him greatly of course, and I value his thoughts and opinions, but this isn’t the driving force behind my internal serenity. I enjoy being able to behave as a slave because it is the ultimate expression of my true feelings for Him. When He requests something of me by way of action or words, He is able to freely express His wishes without being hindered by society’s views of what is and is not appropriate in His requests. In turn, by bending to His will, learning from His instruction, serving Him and following His lead obediently, I am freed from society’s confinements on what is viewed as inappropriate behavior in my expression of adoration.
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Post Commentoldster
On September 22, 2009 at 6:45 pm
Power to your elbow Crystalis–For doing and acting as you please and for objecting to societys stupid restrictive boundaries.
However it is not your willingness to be a slave that would be frowned upon–so much as that of your mate to allow it.
Crystalis DeCavalier
On September 22, 2009 at 8:01 pm
One would think that would be the case wouldn’t one? And yet I have found that even among those within the lifestyle itself, that it tends to be the Slave that is looked at as “allowing” themselves to be overly dependent or weak. It seems to be a very common misconception. Granted there are those that are simply doormats willing to be walked on and refusing to stand up for themselves in the event of abuse. And I think it is these types that tend to set forth the view that everyone has of the rest of us that would fall into the submissive or slave category. But there is definitely a difference between dominance and abuse. Some understand this and others do not. Perhaps that is something I will address in my next article on the subject. But back to your comment, I do understand what you mean but I can also assure you that it is not always the case. Once I “came out” to my friends about my relationship with my mate, I actually received quite a few comments from them regarding how attentive, kind and loving he is toward me. I think perhaps that he has even helped to dispel some of the misunderstandings they may have had about what dominance and mastery truly are in the context of a committed and nurturing relationship. Needless to say, I am exceedingly happy with my place at his side and as such wear his collar proudly for all to see. I consider myself one of the lucky ones for I found a truly good man that understands and meshes well with my own inner nature by providing the structure I need in order to feel whole.
Thank you for the comment Oldster! I appreciate the feedback!
spiritwalker
On September 22, 2009 at 9:29 pm
*the faerie giggles and lays back upon her mushroom…”So many misconceptions my dear…just as if you were daark faerie.Oh woe to the misunderstood.”
Mastertone
On November 4, 2011 at 11:00 pm
perfect perfect perfect observation. It is exactly how I see it and I am a male dom. It is one of the disagreements I face all the time when women cant see the beauty in surrender. Nice writing