The Psychological Key to a Longer Life 2

As we saw in part 1, psychological fear is the x-factor that can destroy a life. To better understand how to get rid of it, we must examine its causes which we always find in our infancy.

When you were a kid, perhaps you went through the “monster-in-the-closet” phase. We naturally fear darkness, because we have inherited an ancestral reaction to danger when man lived in caverns or up in the trees. Night time brought with it unknown predators that could see much better than our primitive forefathers and our only defense was the invention of fire. Nowadays we have artificial light to replace it.

Unfortunately, many people never got over their ancestral fear as they became adults. If your parents did not offer their understanding and protection against “unknown monsters of the night”, if they ridiculed your concerns as a child or even punished you, you have retained quite a baggage that saddles your psyche and prevents you from emerging as a contented human being.

A married woman fears losing her husband, as he represents her protection against “unknown potential enemies”, especially at night. These irrational fears spring from the depths of our unconscious, also known as Id. They are alarm signals that were useful when we fought to survive amongst dangerous animals; they are important to modern soldiers in warfare. But they no longer serve their purpose in modern civilian life; they only interfere with our daily living, causing nightmares and affecting our self-esteem.

Strategy 1

To control those irrational fears, we must control what comes from our Id. According to Freud, the unconscious only wants pleasure and immediate satisfaction. The only structure that can make sure the Id does not take over is the Ego. Another famous psychologist, Carl Gustav Jung, spoke of a collective unconscious that contains archetypes, or models of experiences inherited from the dawn of humanity (That was a bit heavy, but necessary). This collective memory will eventually form part of the Ego through self-actualization.

We already know that the Ego is the key to our inner peace. The stronger it is, the better it can control the Id (in which the collective memory is stored).

Strategy 2

Allow me to use another famous psychologist, Abraham Maslow. I admire his work for its clarity and simplicity (apparent). He states that we have several stages of needs and that each level must be satisfied before we become concerned with the next. Without going into details, let’s just give a clear example: A hungry (really hungry) man does not care about being safe, all he wants is food. Once he has eaten, he will have time to check his safety concerns.

So once we have satisfied basic needs, we reach the top level he calls “self actualization”. In his own words, “it is the instinctual need of humans to make the most of their abilities and to strive to be the best they can” (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-actualization#Self-actualization).

In other words, you and me, all adults must make the most of life; we must fulfill our potential in order to reach contentment. And the key element is creativity.

Strategy 3

How many people do you know who are truly creative? Are you, yourself? Look at the poor bureaucrats, office workers, assembly line workers, even school teachers, managers, store clerks, and so on. Do their faces reflect contentment? Do you think they perform creative tasks?

If the job you have doesn’t allow for creativity, you are one of the thousands, millions of citizens whose whole life is drudgery. It’s time to change, and I am not talking of watching reruns on TV or filling out the daily crosswords in the local paper. That’s not creativity!

Your inner self is hurting badly, your ego is clamoring for the tools it needs to find contentment, to find happiness. Get going, start being creative! There are so many ways, from the simple (yeah, right) task of raising your child properly to taking the piano lessons you always wanted.

Let your inner child come out singing and your whole life will change. Do it now!