Understanding Control Freaks
by What is it that makes us into control freaks? Can we move beyond it? This article takes a close look at this special type of human behavior and what may be at its roots.
Control freakiness then, is fear of the unknown—fear of the random—fear of spontaneity— fear of life. Understanding control freakiness does not mean we can escape dealing with it. We must encounter it along with all of the other distortions of human behavior that result from our social systems. What can we do to help? We can do our part be creating choices whenever possible, for both ourselves and others. The more we create choices, the more we are able to derail control freakiness. Children, as a rule, respond better when given choices. How are we any different? We all have a fundamental freedom living deep within us. We always have choices. Let’s put it this way; the more we choose to acquiesce in the face of control freakiness, the more we have operated out of the same fear that creates it.
Honestly, I confront control freakiness at every turn. I take great joy in introducing the random and absurd in social situations for only that it challenges our habits of wanting to systemize and control. It is my own personal way of fighting the inorganic system. I believe in natural anarchy and that balance that nature discovers all by itself. You have only to look at other kingdoms and species to witness the harmony and integrity living there. Control is not something my body or psyche likes AT ALL.
All I can hope to do is more fully understand, and hope that this understanding moves more and more into compassion. If I start looking at all the things I would change about society, I just hurt and hurt. We must all live with each other. I DO believe that first and foremost, we must accept one another the best we can. Secondly, I believe we must strive to not act out of fear. This is not easy, but it sends the right message always. No single person created society. It is something we all contribute to and create every day as we encounter each other and relate. Can we be kind? I suppose this is another unknown. Let us bring this new clarity into our awareness, and then stay open to allowing it to operate as we relate to one another.
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