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10 Rules for Text Messages in New Relationships

If you’re not careful you can spoil a new relationship if you use text communication incorrectly. These ten rules (plus some bonus knowledge) allow you to make the most of new relationships and to enjoy text.

If you text incorrectly you could blow a new relationship by appearing too cold, too eager or too stupid. You need to get the balance just right, limit the ambiguities and leave something to the imagination. Don’t be boring or depressing. Try not to brag but try to show interest and inject the right amount of humour. Whatever you do avoid the “warts and all” approach to texting and if possible remain mysterious. For a bonus tip you’ll have to read through all TEN RULES of having good text!

FIRST RULE: How to make sure you don’t appear too cold.

Make sure you reply to the text within two hours of its receipt.. If it takes longer than 2 hours, make sure you include a reason for the delay in responding. Of course, should you wish to appear cold respond the following week or not at all.

SECOND RULE: How to make sure you don’t appear too eager.

Apply the half hour rule. This rule dictates that you don’t reply before 35 minutes have elapsed. Of course this rule can be suspended once the relationship is getting somewhere – indeed to have satisfying text (if appropriate) you should have some texts prepared to shoot off as soon as you can,

THIRD RULE: How to avoid looking stupid.

Remember that texts can be stored and read time and time again so any mistake will be noticed, if not immediately, at some point in the future. Unles you are both teenagers, avoid text speak such as m8 (instead of mate) and l8 (instead lf late). Stay away from throw away clichés such as LOL and never use the term PML because you’ll look stupid AND very crude. To really impress include in your text a word which most people spell incorrectly, such as government or environment. Use there, their and they’re in the right context

FOURTH RULE: Don’t be boring.

Sometimes it is better to stay quiet that to text (or talk) and bore someone. Ask yourself, would you like to receive a text that lists the processes involved in cooking a breakfast? Look at the following examples and decide which is least boring

  1. “First of all I ensured the hob was clean and selected the correct frying pan, saucepan and cooking utensils. Then I went to the fridge an removed the eggs and butter. I got the beans from the pantry . . .”
  2. “I enjoyed every mouthful of my delicious breakfast”

If you think A was less boring you really must reassess your behavior. Short and sweet is always better than long and pedantic (when it comes to texting).

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  1. Rachel

    On March 24, 2008 at 6:59 pm


    The lunch rule of texting works amazing or aroud the time of ten. Ten is a great time to text since most people are awake and starting to get bored by that time. Afternoon is the worst since we’re usually pretty busy in the afternoon either working or playing. I hope these help your texting life!

  2. AndAnotherThing

    On January 3, 2010 at 2:38 pm


    text just before lunch and the recipient will associate you with their hunger – that can’t be bad…

  3. AndAnotherThing

    On August 1, 2011 at 2:52 pm


    IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT It has been brought to our attention that the woman who penned this article knows nothing of relationships or, for that matter, mobile phones. Despite this we stand by this writer and all – yes, every last one of ‘em – the writers at AndAnotherThing.

  4. AndAnotherThing

    On November 6, 2011 at 10:43 pm


    Terms such as lol and pml are very unattractive to discerning, educated men but if you want to pull a chav they are fine.

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