10 Rules for Text Messages in New Relationships

FIFTH RULE: Don’t depress your text’s recipient

If you’ve just met and exchanged numbers with someone the last thing they want to hear is that you are depressed, lonely, penniless or without any prospects. If you are any of the aforementioned try and hide it from your would be partner until they have fallen for you. Do not reveal any of these secrets until you have formed a strong relationship and if the relationship never gets to this point – never reveal them. You’ll regret it if you do

SIXTH RULE: Don’t brag.

Remember, nobody likes a big head. If you’re actually very rich, very good looking, very clever or you have excellent prospects DO NOT tell your would be partner about these in a text or on the telephone for that matter. The only way to show someone that you are any or all of the aforementioned is by example. Chances are if you state these things in a text, you’ll appear untruthful.

SEVENTH RULE: Be interested in your text’s recipient

Ask a question about them, their career, their opinion or (if appropriate) their family. Texts that include the words my and mine more than you, your can come across as self obsessed. Texts without questions and purely statement paint a picture of someone a tad arrogant (and that’s an understatement!).

EIGHTH RULE: Try for some humour.

By all means do include a short joke but don’t go off on a surreal path and make it all joke. Too much humour at this stage night present as “bunny boiler”. Keep it jocular but until you know someone well leave the mind games texts until later.

NINTH RULE: Avoid warts and all

Eventually should your new relationship blossom into anything lasting and mutually fulfilling you will know everything about one another “warts and all” as they say. By this I mean both parties guilty secrets from the past and opinions that are difficult to accept. Whatever you do never list these in a get it off your chest text. I know one man who always does this and then wonders why he get stood up by his text recipients – you’ve got to laugh but it’s sad really, when you think.

TENTH RULE: Remain mysterious

Be enigmatic. A picture can say more than a thousand words or fifty texts sent one after another. Send pictures that you think your recipient will keep. If you succeed in doing this your recipient will think of you every time they look at it. By pictures I don’t mean ones of you in a compromising position or of you without full apparel. I’m thinking more of beautiful landscapes, animals or anything you think appeals to your new love interest. Examples include trains (if he’s a train spotter), celebrities eating if (she’s a celebophile) or plates of delicious food (if s/he is a foody). If it’s true that a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, wait until you know what his favourite food is, cook it or acquire it using other methods (get you Mom to cook it or buy an example) and send him a picture of that.

BONUS RULE: If you want to get anyone’s complete attention time your texts to arrive just before their lunchtime. I haven’t the time to explain why this should be the case but believe me this is BONUS knowledge.