10 Things You Should Know About the Opposite Sex: For Men

Women can seem like an enigma wrapped in a mystery to most guys- and sometimes it doesn’t matter what you say, it always turns out to be the wrong thing. Like, when she asks you if her butt looks big in her new jeans and you accidentally tell her that her butt has always looked big, the jeans are fine? Yeah, things like that can get most guys into a lot of trouble. It can be a difficult task trying to keep your girlfriend or wife happy, but there are some things that you should know about the opposite sex- and they might just help you to make sense of the strange creatures that were really are! Here are 10 must know things about women.

1. When we say that we look fat, it means that we want you to tell us that we are not fat in anyway and that we are the most gorgeous and sexy person that you have ever laid eyes on- we DO NOT want to you ever tell us that we need to loose a few pounds- EVER!
2. Women go to the bathroom together because they often like to talk about the men they are dating… beware the next time you take your partner on a double date, make sure that you are nice to her!
3. Women bitch about each other all of the time, it is never okay to say to us “Hey, I thought you said that she was a skanky ho the other day?” in front of one of our friends that we have bitched about- do not get involved in women’s friendships!
4. We are always right and men are always wrong- it is just a fact, so even if you know you are right just agree with her and she will love you for it.
5. Women are self conscious about absolutely everything- even the teeny tiny hairs growing on our faces, so it is not okay to point out that we might need to wax because we are starting to grow a moustache- not unless you want a black eye, anyway.
6. When it is ‘the time of the month’ women will be irrational, hate men and need a fridge stocked full of chocolate ice cream- never try to argue with a woman when it is her time of the month, because fellas, you are never going to win that fight!
7. We compare ourselves to everyone- even the slimmest, tallest, sexiest supermodel in the world and you must always tell us that we are better looking that her- even if you fancy the other person like rotten!
8. When we tell you that we cannot go out with you because we are washing our hair, it basically means that we are not interested to quit calling!
9. Women have bad habits too- we just don’t let you see them.
10. Yes- women really do break wind!

So there you have it- 10 things that you must know about the opposite sex. Women are a complicated mess of hormones sometimes and often, men can be quite unsympathetic about it- so the next time your girlfriend is weeping in front of the mirror because she has a tiny spot on her chin, tell her that nobody can see it and that you would love her even if she was covered in spots- because, well that is just what guys are supposed to do! That is why we love you so much!