A blog about closure and how to find it.
What’s in a word? Well, depending on the word, a lot! The word closure, for example, has six words within it (possibly more). All of them in some way relate to the term closure.
At one time or another in our lives, we may need to say goodbye to a particular situation or person. Sometimes it’s because we were done wrong or sometimes we are just ready to move onto a new chapter of our lives. Other times we are not ready but life has forced us to come to a realization that something has happened beyond our control.
So what is closure and how do we get it? Although my last name does not possess an MD after it, I would have to say that closure is accepting a circumstance as it is and finding a conclusion that allows you to come to a mental truce. So what’s in this word and what does closure require?
Close – Ultimately, we may have to close a door on a situation or close a chapter of life because it has ended. When we do this, we become less interested in revenge or “winning” and more interested in keeping that door closed so we can see what’s in the window of our life.
Lose – You may feel like you have lost in some sense. Whether it is pride, dignity, material possessions, your sanity or maybe even your heart but it will hurt more to focus on the losses. Instead, ask yourself what have you gained? Newfound knowledge from a relationship that’s gone awry? Or perhaps memories that will keep you smiling even though that person no longer can? These are the quintessential fibers of life and learning. What can you take from this ending to enhance your next beginning?
Lure – The past sometimes has a way of keeping us bitter and trite, doesn’t it? That’s why closure is so important. It allows us to look forward to new opportunities and friendships. There may be sabotaging relationships that need to be closed up but for some reason you can’t find a way to. Just remember the more you live in your past, the less you time you have to experience your future and all it has to offer. More importantly, that means you are not living today and today is all we really have for sure. If you need a picture or a memory to help you, then use it. Maybe even a quote that helps you come to grips with the situation as it is and not as you would have had it to be.